Birdie Wing: Golf Girls’ Story – 05 – Golf Eve Online: Aoization

After that doomed mad dash to the golf course in a poorly chosen classic car driven by Tinarina from Raw Time, Aoi feels betrayed…until she sees Eve’s ball soaring through the sky as the plane takes off. Once back in Japan Aoi tries to get back on the first flight to Nafrece, and she’s only stopped by Shinjou.

Aoi is feenin’ for Eve so hard, she barely manages a shrug at the appearance of her top amateur rival Himekwa Mizuho, and even lets slip to her mom/sponsor Seira that she met someone amazing at the tournament. Seira immediately launches an investigation into this “Eve Aleon”.

Meanwhile, Eve can think of nothing more than getting back on the course with Aoi. She’s listless, and needs to get the doe eyes from her three kid siblings to get off her ass and hustle Mr. Kevin a sixth or seventh time. She ultimately wins, since Lily buys pizza to celebrate, but it’s touch and go at the beginning of the three-hole game.

Eve just isn’t feeling the “heat” she felt at the tournament playing Eve, and worse still, thinks she may never feel that heat playing golf again. I mean, if you can’t play with your soul mate, what’s the point of anything? I be she wishes she’d gotten Aoi’s contact info, huh?

While Aoi and Eve struggle with being apart, Rose stops by Cathy’s HQ to collect the not inconsiderable payout she got when Eve beat Dollar Tree Morticia. Cathy wants to hire Eve to work exclusively, envisioning she can “service” fans even if she loses. Rose says that sounds like a great idea but probably wouldn’t fly.

Mind you, Rose most assuredly doesn’t discourage Cathy for Eve’s sake; Eve is a tool she wants to use to make money. Cathy knows this too, and so her pursuit of Eve has probably only just begun. As for Seira’s investigation, when she learns Eve is an “illegal golfer with mafia ties” she stops worrying about Aoi having a genuine rival.

To Seira, Eve is just a “pebble” on Aoi’s otherwise smooth road to success (and succession), but to Aoi, Eve is everything. When Clara introduces Eve to the concept of VR golf and how it’s particularly popular in Japan, Eve decides to try it out, presumably in the astronomically small chance she’ll run into Aoi virtually.

I love the whole VR setup, which is the kind of advanced SAO-style full-dive tech our world has a long way to go to achieving. The details are great, from how she’s so focused on golfing she lets the attendant dress her up as a techno cat maid, to the way the course uncannily moves so she doesn’t have to.

Rose’s manipulation of Eve’s motivation is so unyielding, she not only sends a message to Aoi in the middle of the night masked as a message from Eve, and shows Eve rankings that indicate there’s one player in all of VR-dom better than her…she listens in on the two when they inevitably reunite on the course, albeit a fake one.

And what a reunion it is, what with how wildly the two are dressed and how much they missed each other after such a short time. It’s clear even seeing virtual versions of each other (which aren’t that different from their real selves) really puts a spark back into both of them after how down they felt in each other’s absences.

Still, Eve is frustrated that she can’t play Aoi on a real golf course, so Aoi gets her to promise to meet her one one someday soon. That means getting on the youth golf tour for real—without “special invitations”, but if it’s to play golf with Aoi, Eve is ready to pinky swear. She would have, too, if she wasn’t suddenly logged off.

A tearful Lily is the one who logged her off, and she has terrible news…they’re about to lose their home. Is this more Rose fuckery, as in they can buy the place from whoever is taking it if Eve wins another match for her? I wouldn’t put it past her. Either way, if there’s a way out of this crisis, I’m sure it will be golf-related. Hell, it had better be…

Rating: 4/5 Stars

Birdie Wing: Golf Girls’ Story – 04 – Snakebit

When Aoi missed her putt, Eve confronts her angrily, thinking she let her win. But Aoi admits the miss was “her mistake”—apparently no one noticed Anri flashing a laser into Aoi’s eye before she putted, including Aoi herself. But she wants to have another go at a real game with Eve, so they agree to meet back at the course at 5 AM so they can play until her flight back to Japan.

Normally Eve would be able to keep such an appointment, but Catherine cashes in on Rose’s favor to her for letting Eve into the tournament that very night, and Rose and Anri deliver her to a massive configurable underground golf course. This is just the window-lickin’ craziest shit.

Eve is Catherine’s golfer, while her opponent in a real estate deal, fellow mobster Mr. Nicolas, has hired the thoroughly corny Vipère, a vampy minx in a leather catsuit. In addition to their employers’ bet, Vipère makes it interesting for her and Eve by saying whoever loses becomes the personal property of the other for a day.

Eve is neither amused nor impressed by all this nouveau riche and faux-vampiric posturing, and simply wants to get on with the game. But every other shot she makes is totally off, and she has no idea why…until she notices the same thing most of the audience probably noticed immediately: Vipère stinks. Not at golf, but literally.

Every time Vipère unzipped the front of her catsuit near Eve, she messed up. Turns out her perfume is a sublt poisons that threw her game off just enough to almost lose. Not about to lose to a cheater with fangs and a way too active tongue, Eve uses her Yellow Bullet to drive her ball out of a bunker and straight into the hole, beating Vipère and fulfilling her favor to Rose and Catherine.

What follows is a lot of plot malarkey, unfortunately. First, Eve has Vipère drive her to the course to meet with Aoi…in Vipère’s slow antique car. Aside from it not being Vipère’s style at all (why is it yellow?) Anri was right there in the parking lot with a Jaguar XJS, which if I know Rose had a V12. Combined with the fact the distance from the underground course to the above-ground one wasn’t revealed until it became a problem, and my eyes were rolling like a Titleist on the green.

Just as Anri manufactured Aoi’s loss and Vipère almost manufactured Eve’s, the the plot tomfoolery ends up manufacturing the first major interpersonal conflict between Aoi and Eve, as Aoi waits as long as she can but has to board her flight before Eve gets there. She leaves her Pac-Man ball on the tee, but drew a tear in its eye and “Liar” on the other side.

As her plane takes off, Aoi spots Eve and her Blue Bullet taking flight. So, I guess the airport is right next to the golf course? What with that crazy golf bunker, I half-expected Eve’s golf ball to go into the jet engine, forcing it to land and giving the two a chance to play.

Of course, there’s a good chance that would have ended in fiery tragedy, so maybe it’s best Eve didn’t hit the plane….I just hope their budding friendship hasn’t been shattered irrevocably. After all, Aoi began the episode with a mistake caused by others; now that Eve was late, the two are even par, as they should be.

Birdie Wing: Golf Girls’ Story – 03 – Just Golf, Baby

Eve doesn’t half-ass anything. When given an audience with Rose’s boss, a higher-up in the Nafrece underworld, she offers up her damn body in exchange for the chance to play in the U15 Tournament. Fortunately, the boss lady rejects that offer, but I am worried about the one she accepts, which Rose brings up without Eve knowing what it is.

Whatever Faustian deal Eve is now tangled up in, all that matters is that she’s able to keep her promise to Aoi to play one round—in this case, the final round of a world tournament. Rose makes sure she looks the part, dressing her in her boss’ brand name attire and giving her a full set of clubs. After a couple episodes in street clothes, it’s great to see Eve all glowed up.

The two other girls in her team unfortunately go through hell, as Rose tells Anri, because Eve is a simple destroyer, concerned only with defeating her one opponent; Aoi, who enters the final round 9 under par. As Rose racks up a -3 in four holes Rose further describes how Eve’s style of golf methodically destroys any opponents in her vicinity, causing them to forget their own styles in a hopeless bid to keep up.

While her group mates are probably going to be feeling the negative aftereffects on their own games for many matches in the future, Aoi is spellbound by Eve’s performance. As the leader, Aoi is in the final group with the latest tee time, but she just can’t wait to get out there and play “in the same air” as Eve, who she can tell is having a blast.

Aoi begins her round knowing Eve’s score, and insists that Amane keep her updated every three holes via hand signals. Amane is fine doing this because 1.) she’ll take whatever motivation for Aoi she can get and 2.) she’s quite certain even Eve can’t hope to beat Aoi. But while Amane knows Aoi’s game like the back of her hand, she’s only seen a little bit of what Eve can do. This time, she sees more, including how accurate she can be even while driving her ball through the same woods where it got lost in her last game with Aoi.

While Eve and Aoi duel, their respective support groups watch; her classmates at the fancy Raiou Girls Academy in Japan (the architecture of which reminds me of a car dealership or auto parts store for some reason), where we meet Haruka, Aoi’s supposed rival in her homeland, and Ichina, who wants to be a caddy for someone like Aoi, not a player, and is training accordingly.

They, like Amane, and even Eve herself, believe it’s a foregone conclusion Aoi will go one point under Eve to take the win on the 18th hole. But on what should be a straightforward birdie putt misses the cup, an error so timely and uncharacteristic it makes me wonder if there’s some kind of chicanery involved. That feeling is amplified watching Rose spreading her arms at the sun like a villain about to cackle.

While I don’t forsee I’ll be the biggest fan of Eve and/or Aoi being pawns to these gangsters, this episode was 99% Eve and Aoi enjoying the absolute goddamn hell out of a match together, and however it ends, they’re going to want to play each other again as soon as possible. After all, until someone shows up who can beat either of them, they’re all they’ve got.

Tsukimichi: Moonlit Fantasy – 08 – Tough Love Tomoe

For a show called Moonlit Fantasy, there’s an awful lot of reality rearing its practical head this week. Tomoe reports that the orc and lizardmen warriors are, in a word, terrible; not 10% as strong as she’d like them to be. No doubt inspired by her historical dramas, Tomoe organizes a tournament of sorts in which the various races fight each other, thus making each other stronger. Mio doesn’t really participate in any of this, while Makoto simply has to sit and look stoic.

Makoto factors even less in the next segment, in which Tomoe focuses her drill sergeant skills on the four-person party of Toa, Hazal, and the elf and dwarf women. Blessed as they were by the goddess, she knows there’s a lot more she can get out of them if properly trained, which translates to exhausting, torturous and life-threatening for the four adventurers.

When the four go up against a group of boss-level monsters called shadow tails, they forget their training and three of them rush headlong into the fight while Hazal stays back and heals/supports. This is all wrong, and is the real reason they think they can’t beat the beasts, not because they’re not powerful enough. She has them set a trap and then play to their strengths, and they make quick work of the shadow tails, surprising themselves in the process.

They’re again weary when Tomoe sends them to clear out an entire cave of shadow tails, this time without her supervision, but just as the guild girl is telling Tomoe what a low chance of success the four will have, they burst through the doors of the adventurer’s guild tired, bloodied, but victorious. Tomoe isn’t just talk (and mimicking TV); she really can bring out the best in people.

While it’s generally good fun watching Tomoe put Toa & Co. through their paces and showing them they’re stronger than they thought, Makoto is relegated to side character status, asking Rembrandt for some shop space to rent. Rembrandt gives him a counteroffer of some space in a neutral city where the Kingdom in which Tsige resides can’t bother Makoto with their passionate devotion to espionage.

Mio also gets very little to do until the very end of the episode when Makoto orders her to Tinarak Forest to gather ambrosia fruit. But as another adventuring party trudges through the dense woods, they are shadowed by a pair of silver-haired elves(?) who don’t think very highly of humans at all. In all, it was a serviceable, functional episode, but it was neither all that exciting nor all that humorous. It was just kind of there.

The Day I Became a God – 04 – Slapping the Winds Together

After a virtually incomprehensible cold open in which Suzuki watches an interview between two scientists that left me scratching my head, we’re back to the Narukami residence, with Youta catching the beautiful, brilliant lawyer Tengan Kakou on the TV.

Before he knows it, Hina is winning an online mahjong preliminary in his name, stamping his ticket to the in-person tournament organized by his TV crush! Even Izanami, a mahjong buff herself, attends along with his best mate Ashura.

I’m just going to put this out there: I don’t know jack-squat about competitive Mahjong, having only played the solitaire version that’s just matching up like tiles. Narukami is similarly a complete novice, but received precise divine instruction from Hina. His resulting tactics in the game do not conform to the traditional competitive play—which just happens to be what Tengan Kakou wants.

This episode seems like a case of me enjoying watching Narukami fall far behind as if he had no idea what he was doing (because he didn’t, he’s just following Hina to the letter) then come roaring back with some frankly ludicrous bending of the rules, which even leads to the adoption of Uno rules. At the same time, I kept feeling a bit left out due to my aforementioned ignorance of Mahjong’s rules and terminology.

Fortunately, what we saw probably couldn’t be described as anything resembling a “normal” game, and indeed there were times when it seemed the show was parodying serious obscure game competition shows like Chihayafuru. Youta simply kept bastardizing the obscure terms until he adopted a game language all his own.

Not only does he win fame (and likely a tidy cash prize), but the attention of Tengan Kakou, who is initially cordial in her congratulations but before long is macking strongly on someone I assumed hasn’t quite reached age 18. Those uncomfortable undertones aside, their use of Mahjong terms as double entendres makes for quite the side-splitting exchange between the two:

“I’d like to see your infinite reiichi.”

“But you can score! An incredibly high-value hand! It’s an extraordinary yaku you may never encounter again!”

“I’m in unrequited love with another woman, which earns me the furiten penalty. Therefore, I am unable to score!”

Sadly for Youta, the unrequited love for whom he spurned the Great Tengan Kakou (leading to her sic’ing her bodyguard on him, who tears off the sleave of the suit he borrowed from his dad) took off for home without waiting for him, rendering this entire enterprise somewhat pointless.

There are thirteen days left until the end of the world. Unless something of genuine substance comes from the hacker-and-scientist side of things, it’s looking like Hina’s goal isn’t for Youta to help her save the world from ending, but simply living his life to the fullest until it does end. Or perhaps these experiences are somehow preparing him to save the world when the time is right?

All we know is, Youta has performed a piece of music for Izanami, rescued a family ramen joint, and won a mahjong tournament all in the same summer, with more to come. He’s having himself quite a summer. Like the ridiculous mahjong match he played, I’m fine just enjoying the crazy ride for now.

The Misfit of Demon King Academy – 09 – The Other Side of the Story

Flash back two thousand years to the Human capital of Gairadite. Anos stops by, walking nonchalantly through every barrier the Humans can throw at him. But he’s not here to conquer, but to forge a peace. Hero Kanon is incredulous, but seems willing to hear Anos out. His general Jerga…isn’t, and ends up with Anos’ hand through his chest.

Back in the present, Menou Historia has “temporarily” replaced Emilia-sensei, and informs the class of the impending inter-academy classes in three weeks. We learn Demons and Humans use magic in very different ways.

A select team of students will travel to Azeshion’s Hero Academy, Arclaniska. For everyone but Anos it will be everyone’s first trip to the Human Realm, and he wants to make sure they’re ready, tirelessly sparring with Misha, Sasha, Lay, and Misa.

He also gives Lay a magic sword that was once master by his right-hand-man, whom I assumed was Shin, before remembering the promise he made to Kanon after getting stabbed by the Hero: that if they reincarnated in 2,000 years it would be as friends. So is Lay Shin, or Kanon? It’s not that clear.

Meeting with the newly-freed Melheis, Anos learns that Gaios and Ydol are on the mend, while the Humans’ Hero Academy has raised an elite class of reincarnated heroes, suggesting they may be preparing…something. The students are expected to find their way to Azeshion on their own within ten days; Team Anos (minus the fan club) are teleported there in one second.

While touring the city, Sasha notes how it’s not that different from the Demon capital. When Anos compliments her eyes again, they start to go out of control until Anos calms her down. He promises not to treat her like a child if she’ll promise to use her eyes to protect everyone if he’s ever unable to do so.

They arrive at the front gate of Hero Academy Arclaniska, where they’re met by third-year student Eleanor Bianca, a friendly, cheerful young woman happy to show them around and impressed by Anos’ knowledge of the Hero Kanon.

When Eleanor tells them how Kanon defeated Anos and built the walls, Sasha is outraged, but Anos far less so. He understands how in order for his peace plan to ultimately work, humans had to make a story in which they were the good guys and victors. What’s odd is, Humans believe the name of the Demon King of Tyranny to be Avos Dilhevia as well.

As for Hero Kanon reincarnated, since he had seven sources (or “hearts”), each could be reincarnated into a different body. Four of those are current students in the elite class, and two of them, Ledriano and Laos, confront Anos when they hear he can’t “accept the defeat” his founding ancestor suffered (of course not knowing Anos is the founding ancestor).

After Laos comes at Anos and is handled easily, Ledriano begs Anos’ forgiveness for his comrade’s rudeness and requests that he and Sasha leave for now. Surely these two will see each other again when the inter-academy skirmishes start. But later Eleanor warns Anos that if he’s looking for the original Hero Kanon reincarnate, he may be disappointed, since Kanon was murdered two thousand years ago…by a fellow human.

Featuring a new setting of the Human Realm with its requisite hierarchies, players, and alternate history, this first episode of the inter-academy mini-arc is functional, if uninspiring, expanding the show’s world but lacking the awe and excitement of the previous episode’s battles. There were moments this week when I wished the details of the mythology were less muddled, but that’s at least partly the point: a lot can change in two thousand years.

The Misfit of Demon King Academy – 08 – Slashing Through Absolute Space

Prior to the start of the final duel between Anos and Ray, the owl MC fitted Anos with a Spirit Drain Ring that saps his Magic Power. If that power is depleted, Ray’s mother will die. If he defeats Ray, the contractual Magic Sword will destroy his source.

Ray decides to damage the contractual sword himself anyway, breaking his contract and leaving him with nothing but his fight with Anos. It’s a duel they both wish to fight for its own sake, not for any outside stakes.

When Anos stabs Ray through the chest (at the cost of his own arm), he learns that both the contractual sword and his participation in the tournament was arranged as part of a plot to eliminate him for good.

The author of this plot? Melheis, who promptly locks Anos in a dimensional prison with more than half of his Magic Power drained.

Melheis seems to have thought this plan out very thoroughly, as it employs multiple contingencies, from the use of Ray’s mom as a hostage to creating an “Absolute Space” where he and only he can reside, thus preventing him from ever being defeated.

He even saved a part of the wall Anos himself used to divide the world into four. What Melheis overlooks is the fact Ray had already made peace with the fact he wasn’t going to be able to save his mother no matter what.

That, and that by bringing his mother into the dimensional prison, he brought the one person who could destroy Ray’s pessimistic resolve with hope and love. She remembers when he slashed a pot with a kitchen knife. Now she becomes a sword (her true spirit form) with which he’s able to slash the un-slashable Absolute Space.

Melheis’ third and final mistake is attempting to eliminate Anos with Beno Ievun (the wall spell) after sapping so much of his Magic Power. Rather than the intended effect of killing Anos, it instead releases a limiter of sorts that had resided in Anos’ Destruction Source. Anos had never faced quite this much peril, so the true depths of his power had been limited…until now.

With that power he summons Venuzdnor, chops Melheis’ legs off, and destroys the prison. He then destroys a tiny Sword of Subordination that was attached to Melheis’ brain, thus explaining his sudden heel turn. With that brain bug destroyed, Melheis is again loyal to Anos.

The duel ends with Anos as the winner, and he makes a very loud and precise speech to all the assembled spectators in the arena and throughout the land crediting his victory to his sword, which contained his father’s very soul.

By doing so, he’s able to create the “tradition” of souls within swords that enables him to heal Ray’s mother’s source and revive her safe and sound (again, her true form being a sword). Ray never had to choose between his life, his mom’s, or Anos. Go fam!

All that’s left is the presentation of Anos’ trophy sword, which has always traditionally been performed by a Necron, hence Sasha making a last-minute appearance in an exquisite dress and a very cute alternate hairstyle. While she initially coldly holds the sword out to him, when he asks her to stick to the script she draw close and kisses his cheek.

Sasha took the job because she knew Anos would win, and she’d never accept any Demon King but him (though we may have gotten our first glimpse of the usurper Avos Dilhevia). Misha, meanwhile, never one for jealousy, simply asks if Anos had fun. He did!

Demon King Academy turned out another baroque magical skirmish that threatened to collapse under the weight of its arcane magical jargon. But just like the battle that saved Misha and Sasha, everything was held together with a solid emotional core, carefully prepared and supported by previous episodes.

Anos isn’t just an all-powerful Demon King. He’s a son who loves his mom and dad, and can and will do anything and everything for his friends. His enemies, while crafty, lack that sense of family unity and are instead held together by a patchwork of defeatable spells, trinkets, and fear; all easily defeatable. That’s why Anos always wins.

The Misfit of Demon King Academy – 07 – The Prey Dances

Emilia’s brother (whose name I’ve forgotten) proves to be no challenge at all to Anos. His fan club unveils their new fight song, the lyrics for which include such choice double entendres such as “we are blessed with the sword of our noble Sir Anos” and “You’re below me, and I’m on top”. He credits his newly forged sword holding up to the amount of love his dad poured into it. Emilia-sensei is notably pissed that Anos embarrassed her brother and noble family.

After also easily defeating his first opponent, Ray visits Anos and Misa and tells them they can no longer be friends, as he’s officially a Royalist now, and vows to kill Anos. Anos tells him to try it right there and then, and in the resulting fracas, learns that there’s a contractual magic sword implanted within Ray’s body as a form of control.

This essentially makes him a hostage whose heel turn was orchestrated by the Royalists, and both he and his mom die if he defies them. In a move surely designed to put her in danger later on, Anos’ mom takes charge of his sword, with the fan club serving as her bodyguards.

This leads Anos and Misa to visit Ray’s mother, and while Anos determines there’s no way he can save her by giving her some of his life, the same doesn’t go for Misa, who like Ray’s mother is a demon-spirit hybrid. Despite the risk to her own source and life, Misa is determined to do what she can for Ray’s mom so he’ll have no reason to cooperate with the enemy.

As for Anos’ mom, she’s confronted by Emilia (who is drunk on power but not booze) who orders her to surrender Anos’ sword. Mama won’t do it, so Emilia gets rough. I should be shocked Emilia would be so brazen in her villainy, but then as a pureblood Royalist she considers any and all non-Royalists to be scum. The fan club does their best to protect Anos’ mom, even singing the fight song as Emilia slowly roasts them with her superior magic.

Anos shows up in the nick of time to save his mom, resurrects the eight fan club members, learns their names and promises to remember them, as he’s indebted to them all. As for the girls, I’m sure they’re just happy to have been of service to their noble Demon King.

Emilia does not get let off easily, and frankly I can’t blame Anos for getting particularly sadistic; Emilia went after his mom—who would never hurt a fly—and murdered eight of her students. As punishment, Anos kills Emilia, resurrects her as a hybrid, and ensures that no matter how many times she dies, she’ll always come back a hybrid. Yikes!

As I said, the punishment is tough, but fair and justified; hopefully Emilia will develop a less prejudiced perspective on the world going forward. Meanwhile, Misa has been working on Ray’s mom this whole time, and while he pulls a knife on her when he arrives, once he learns Misa is helping his mom he stands down.

When Ray tells her the day may come when she’ll have to put her life on the line, Misa pointedly replies that that day has already come. If she can’t stop one person’s suffering here and now, she’ll never be able to do it later. If Ray hadn’t put her to sleep, she probably would have sacrificed her life. Instead, Ray and his mom get to talk to each other one last time.

While it’s uncertain whether his mom will ever recover, Ray appears at the tournament finals with clear eyes and a smile, apparently no longer under the heel of the Royalists (though we’ll see if that sword inside him comes into play).

As expected, he and Anos are the finalists. The result probably isn’t in doubt—an Anos win—but no doubt Ray will make it interesting, and in the process perhaps reveal how he knew the Demon King back in the day.

Cardcaptor Sakura – 34 – This…Is…HOEEEpardy!

(Title reference located here.) This was a weird episode. For one thing, there was no cardcapturing. There wasn’t even a new Clow Card to capture. I demand my money back! But seriously, the episode involves a quiz tournament involving questions about Tomoeda Town, and participants must pair up.

Sakura’s first choice is Tomoyo, but she can’t film Sakura if she participates in the tournament. Yukito ends up volunteering to be Sakura’s partner, something that immediately makes her day. It should also be noted that Chiharu pairs up with Yamazaki. In addition to being her soul mate, the kid knows a lot about a lot when he’s not bullshitting!

Syaoran, who reluctantly enters the tournament when Meiling insists he join her, is jealous of Sakura’s luck, but there’s an interesting point when he blushes more upon seeing Sakura smile than watching Yukito. Interesting!

We also learn why Yukito didn’t pair up with his soul mate Touya; Sakura’s big bro’s job-of-the-day is working as a assistant on the tournament’s first leg. Yukito helps them pass by realizing ten matchsticks in the shape of a star can also form “a different star” by forming the strokes of the kanji for “star”. Not sure what that has to do with the town, but whatevs!

As Meiling gets stuck on that first question, Sakura and Yukito breeze through the next questions, eventually reaching Mizuki-sensei for the tenth and final challenge: how to get a small ball out of an Erlenmeyer flask without turning it over or breaking it.

Sakura eventually figures it out (fill it with water from the nearby cooler so the ball will rise to the top), as Mizuki shoots some questions at Yukito. Clearly she can sense something about him that has to do with the current full moon, which Sakura notes can be seen during the day when skies are clear.

Mizuki warns her about the full moon, but it would probably have been more hazardous that night if it were a new moon, since the lack of light would make moving around tricky. Even so, Sakura gets momentarily fixated on the moon and ends up stumbling off a cliff.

Sakura has the Tokyo Tower dream before coming to safe and sound; fortunately, Yukito managed to cushion her fall. Unfortunately, he hurts his knee in the process, but he did happen to find the nadeshiko sigil that marks their completion of the tournament. It’s the prize in lieu of a Clow Card.

Just as Touya, Syaoran, and Sakura’s friends are starting to worry, Sakura and Yukito show up, with the latter leaning on the former for support. Everyone’s safe and sound, and all’s well that ends well.

While Sakura got some crucial bonding time with Yukito and you could say she’s progressed a bit in her one-sided courtship, the mysteries of the Tokyo Tower dream, the shadowy figure, and the “Yue” Kero mentioned last week remain unsolved, while the quiz tournament itself was a bit of a dawdle.

The God of High School – 05 – Punch Pals

Mori’s semifinal fight with Mr. Brazilian Jujitsu is as short as Daewi’s against Mira, if not quite as violent. While Mira has no hard feelings—the stronger fighter won—and is on the mend, how Daewi beat Mira doesn’t sit right with Mori, and believes there’s a score to settle with their mututal friend.

Neither Mori nor Daewi pull any punches, as the latter is just as ferocious against Mori as he was against Mira, and also makes it clear hes never thought of either of them as his friends, which begs the question: why’d he crash Mira’s wedding? I guess he just doesn’t consider them friends compared to his one and only BFF, Woo Seungtae, who had his back at school and was a willing and enthusiastic brawling partner.

Daewi made a deal with Park to win the semis and the finals “overwhelmingly” so Seungtae could be treated with nanomachines, but it’s too late. Park informs Daewi his friend is dead in the middle of the match and Daewi shuts down…until Mira arrives, delivers a goodbye letter Seungtae wrote, and tells him to get back into the match.

He does so, but after some very spirited brawling replete with stylized ink brushstrokes, Mori ends up besting him, but gives him a hand up once the match is over. Both Mori and Mira end up helping Daewi back to the locker room.

While nowhere near as bad as the last episode, Daewi’s great epic friendship felt both rushed and simplistic, with way too much emphasis on hollow machismo. GoHS also continues to insist that the three leads are best buds without evidence beyond the fact they all love fighting (and getting beaten up). This episode didn’t do enough to convince me to keep watching.

The God of High School – 04 – Wedding Bashers

We’re already down to the regional semifinals as Mori, Mira, and Daewi have all advanced and Mira and Daewi will face off against each other next. I for one thought we’d see another fight or two, but I guess GoHS is eager to get to the higher-stakes nationals. However, the tournament is put on hold when Mira is suddenly approached by sports entertainment tycoon Seongjin, who asks for her hand in marriage.

The suddenness of this development is matched only by the sloppiness with which its fallout unfolds. Mori makes it his mission to stop the wedding, as Mira is still in high school and doesn’t want her to lose her dream of winning the tournament and resurrecting her father’s sword style. But Mira is marrying Seongjin as a shortcut to putting that style on the map.

While I can understand Mori’s objections to the marriage, it’s not as if he’s Mira’s childhood friend. Despite jumps forward in time, it still feels like they’re more casual acquaintances brought together by the tournament, which makes it seem way out of line for him to dictate how he thinks Mira should run her own life. He didn’t even know where she lived for Chrissake!

I mean, let’s get real here: Mira, Mori and Daewi had a couple of brief chats about their goals and shared one little moment fishing her sword out of the water (which was Mori’s fault in the first place). THEY ARE NOT BEST FRIENDS. The show can’t just proceed as if they are, or that they have some kind of unbreakable bond. And yet that’s exactly what this episode does.

I also find it problematic that the only main female lead is portrayed at the start as shortsighted and even stupid for accepting Seongjin’s proposal, and has to be “set straight” by three men: Mori, Daewi, and her uncle, who was a terrible custodian of his late brother’s school. More than that, it’s problematic that Mira considers her life to be so tied to her father’s legacy that she’s given up on living a normal high school life in order to keep the style alive.

Even so, that’s a tall enough task that if a rich and powerful figure in the martial arts world offered a strategic alliance in the form of a marriage, and that she could be as blatant as she wanted in exploiting his prestige to promote her style seems…reasonable? The only reason it isn’t is because all the other characters and the episode itself think it’s a bad idea.

And, oh yeah, because Seongjin is an evil dark shadow clan member just following orders from his grand wizard to obtain the Moon Light Sword style for the organization. So see? See? Mira was a fool for thinking his intentions were honorable!

Everything conspires to put Mira in a box where she looks weak and misguided no matter what she does, because on one path she’s being played by the evil guy, and in the other she’s deferring to her “friends” who Know What’s Right for her. And again, there just hasn’t been enough evidence Mori and Daewi are her good friends.

The jump from “we’ll help you fish out the sword we threw in the drink” to “we’re going to crash your wedding and save you from both yourself and the bad guy” is ludicrously steep and ultimately untenable. Her sudden change of heart just doesn’t work, narratively or emotionally.

To me, the fact Seongjin turned out to be evil is irrelevant; the fact is, Mira’s agency was negated by both Seongjin and her so-called friends. Even more ridiculous is how easily she’s able to defeat Seongjin. Surely, if he’s as big a deal as he says, both publicly and in the shadows, she’d have had a bit more trouble with him? To me, making him look so toothless just underscores how Mira could have potentially gained the upper hand in their strategic marriage.

Never mind, as Mira walks away from the venue smiling and laughing with her bandaged abdomen, taking both Mori and Daewi’s arms. She’s smiling! She’s happy! From the look of their noses, everyone clearly still has bad colds, but all’s well that ends well! Only no; Mira can’t even have a whole episode dedicated to her hastily planned and just-as-hastily cancelled wedding.

Instead we cut to Daewi standing by as his buddy is on death’s door. It’s not clear whether he actually dies, but Daewi takes it out on the bullies who hound him at work, then takes it out on Mira in their semifinal match by exploiting her abdomen wound and beating her to a bloody pulp.

After we’d just dealt with Mori nearly being disqualified for breaking the rules, all three of them ended up assaulting people outside of the tournament this week. While in Mira’s case it was self-defense, both Mori and Daewi should have gotten in trouble for crashing the wedding, and Daewi should have been arrested for assaulting the bullies. But no; everyone was allowed to break the rules and continue the tournament. Interesting.

But yeah, after that whole song-and-dance with Mori, Mira and Daewi being the three best goshdarn friends there ever were, and that the guys support Mira chasing her dream with her own hands, Daewi puts an end to her GoHS run the very next day. I told you they weren’t friends! What a horrific mess. With three straight weeks of decline from the promising first episode, I think I’m done here.

The God of High School – 03 – Life Is a Battle…Do What You Want

After a quick check-in on a cult consisting of members with black pointy hoods (the third such anime to feature this after Misfit/Demon Academy and Food Wars 5—not sure what’s up with that) Mira faces off against Ma Miseon, an American pro-wrestler built like a brick house who assures Mira her wooden sword will be useless.

Miseon indeed exhibits incredible speed, agility and power and Mira looks not only overmatched but like she has no business fighting in the ring…until she loses her wooden sword and Miseon thinks she’s got this in the bag. That’s when Mira demonstrates that she doesn’t actually need a physical blade; her entire body is a sword, and she uses it to quickly eviserate Miseon and claim victory.

Daewi and Mori are happy their new friend has advanced, with the latter itching to fight her himself, but he must face punishment for interference in Gambo/Manseok match (both of whom are out of the tournament). Park Mujin sees that Mori is the grandson of Jin Taejin, and decides to test him by pitting him against a Commissioner. Mujin also gives Mori some suspicious produce, which causes Mori to cough up blood and pass out when after eating it.

We know Daewi wants to win the tournament for money, but now we know what that money is for: his ill friend/brother Seungtae, cut down at the height of his powers by cancer (or something like it). Thugs Daewi used to tangle with think Daewi is vulnerable without Seungtae to back him up, but they might not be thinking that if they saw Daewi dismantle the cerebral Baek Seungchul in the GoHS ring, which he does after taking one hell of a metal bat beating.

With Mira and Daewi both advancing, Mori recovers and arrives for his match with the commissioner, albiet a bit late. It’s a handicap match, and all Mori has to do is knock the guy down. He does that so quickly and both “Green Four-Eyes” and the crowd are insulted, and the former loses his temper and unleashes a summoned jester-like demon-beast.

Park has the other commissioners tackle their colleague and ends the match, naming Mori the winner since he knocked his opponent down. Now he knows he’s dealing with Jin Taejin’s “Tiger Cub” and apparently has big plans for someone of his power and potential.

The God of High School – 02 – Gotta Have a Code

Interestingly, the second GoHS doesn’t pick up where the first ended, but after the battle royale. Mori, Mira and Daewi all advanced, but Mori’s fight with the “slipper jerk” was interrupted by Mira. Turns out all three share the same route home, much to Mira’s consternation. During their walk we learn the basics of their being in the tournament. For Mori, it’s to become stronger. For Daewi, it’s for money.

Mira is fighting for honor and family; namely to save her late father’s dojo. When Mori snatches her sword again and she moves to snatch it back, it ends up in the drink. Mira slaps Mori and tell the other two to scram, but it’s not long before the lads are helping her search the water. They actually find the blade off-screen, but the point is the three bonded over the activity.

The next day the preliminary brackets are set, and the last person standing will move on to the national tournament. When Slipper Jerk (AKA Gang Manseok) attacks his opponent Go Gamdo in the locker room, Mori steps up to defend him, earning Gamdo’s gratitude and respect.

Mori, Mira and Daewi end up winning their respective matches easily, while other faces like Ma Miseon and Baek Seungchul get brief moments in the ring; I’m sure we’ll see more of them as the brackets narrow. But the main fight of the episode is between Manseok and Gamdo.

While Gamdo practices a very pure and conservative tai chi style focused on balance, Manseok reveals a rare northern-style Taekwondo developed for survival in war, filled with all kinds of low blows. As such, this is a match between the “cleanest” and “dirtiest” fighters. We also learn through brief flashbacks that Manseok was once a groveling wretch and transformed himself thanks to a powerful teacher.

Gamdo’s best efforts to win the battle of wills results in his getting beaten to a pulp. Manseok unbinds both his hands and starts breaking Gamdo’s limbs one by one, but Gamdo still won’t yield. In the end, Mori enters the ring (breaking the rules and risking a DSQ) to protect his new friend, and shows that he’s a far more formidable opponent to Manseok—which is probably what he ultimately wants!

The chaos is then broken up by tournament administrators and the arrival of Korean Assembly member Park Mujin, fresh off a visit to the Pentagon where he waltzed right in without fear of getting harmed. He has Mori taken away for TBD punishment, then announces the tournament will resume.

Honestly despite the big central fight this GoHS was a bit of a step down from the premiere in pure manic craziness, mostly because any indoor fight is going to seem restrained compared to the dynamism of a motorcycle -bicycle race. It also wasn’t nearly as funny. It made up for it with a key bonding moment between the likable main trio—though I hope they get more fleshed out soon.

The ep also added more intrigue surrounding users of the superpower cheryeok, which we saw employed like the hand of god smashing out an island last week. I’m confident Mori’s road won’t end with his rule infraction, because the whole point of GoHS tournament seems to be to find exceptionally strong fighters like him.

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