O Maidens in Your Savage Season – 03 – Tough Kids Drink Milo

While Rika is checking a magazine to see how much she actually resembles Erika, Hitoha notices a new book has been published—but not her’s. Her editor says her stories aren’t “realistic” enough. For Hitoha, the message is clear: in order to break onto the young erotic fiction scene, she needs actual experience. So she arranges an IRL meet with “Milo” on the dirty chatroom.

When Izumi talks with Niina in private about the footage she shot, he doesn’t realize how much of a message he sent by taking her arm in class with everyone watching. Still, she’s impressed that he’s quicker on the uptake than she expected, taking her criticism and apologizing rather than bristling.

Even so Niina senses an “old-fashioned” quality to Izumi, and before returning to class (without saying she’d delete the footage) she assures him it’s not just boys who think about “doing it” all the time. Girls think about it too…even Kazusa. And it’s perhaps for that reason that every available male faculty member outright refuses to become the lit club’s adviser, keeping its future in jeopardy.

When Izumi’s mom drags Kazusa in to take home some meatloaf, she asks her to go up to his room to fetch the ketchup. Upon entering (again, without knocking! Girl!), she imagines him with his pants down at the desk again before it fades to an empty chair.

She gets a pang of nostalgia (which must come as a relief) when she sees the DVD for a Ghibli-like film on the desk, but when opening the case, she’s mortified to learn it’s something else entirely: a porn blu-ray, rather inartfully titled The Wheels on the Commuter Bus Go “Oh Yeah, Harder!”

Meanwhile, at the Hongou residence, Hitoha is ready to head out on her date when two misogynists on the TV talk about how mismatching underwear is a turnoff, and steals her sister’s blue bottoms to match her blue bra. As she waits until 1:00pm on the dot to leave the station and head for the statue where she’ll meet her date, she’s understandably nervous, repeating over and over to run if he looks like a shitty (or shitty-looking) guy.

So imagine her shock when “Milo” from the dirty chatroom is a handsome, glasses-less, stylishly-dressed…Yamagichi-sensei! Once he recognizes Hitoha, he bolts. I’d admire him for that, since it means he has no intention of sleeping with Hitoha, but then I wonder how he’d have reacted if it was a different girl her age, and immediately lose the ability to admire him for anything. Regardless, Hitoha follows; she can use this.

Desperate to learn something about sex, especially of the kind between the flowery literature or crass commuter bus porn (that’s quite a range), Kazusa beseeches her parents, who proceed to misunderstand her question and tell her about the day she was born, not the night they conceived her. They’re as ill-prepared to have “the talk” with their daughter as she is to ask them about it. Meanwhile, next door, Izumi panics over his lost porn…until he remembers Kazusa was in his room.

The next day, the principal and vice-principal, clearly scared of young women having a free and open forum to discuss literature of a mildly lascivious nature, are ready to pull the plug on the lit club after their unsuccessful search for an adviser, when Hitoha bursts into the office with a defeated, blackmailed Yamagishi by her side. He’ll be advising the club.

After Yamagishi eloquently analyzes Hitoha’s reading in the club, she twists the knife a little by giving him the same nickname in club (Milo-sensei)as his chatroom name, assuming it comes from Venus de Milo. Before he drives off, she thanks him for letting them continue the club, but he corrects her: he got it from something much more innocent: “Tough Kids Drink Milo,” the slogan of Nestle’s Milo chocolate drink (a personal favorite of mine…I guess I’m a tough kid!)

That evening, with the Norimotos apparently out, Kazusa uses the spare key to slip in and return Izumi’s porn DVD, but before doing so, has another ephiphany, realizing that her childhood friend, ever a lover of transportation, chose a commuter bus porn DVD rather than tarnish his even more beloved trains. Just as when she initially noticed the misleading Ghilbi case, Kazusa feels relieved, even happy that Izumi hasn’t changes as much as she thought.

It’s very sweet moment—and pretty hilarious!—moment. And then Izumi enters his room, correcting her on the format: it’s a Blu-Ray, not a DVD.

He goes on to try to explain and clarify that while he does watch porn (something now painfully clear), that doesn’t mean he’s interested in doing it with anyone; not Asada or any of the other girls at school, and not her, either. No doubt he probably doesn’t think he’s hurting Kazusa with those words, but he cuts her to the quick, and as her eyes well up she races out of the room, so fast that she stumbles down the stairs, and Izumi tumbles after her.

He lands on top of her at the bottom of the stairs, his face just an inch from her’s. How Kazusa doesn’t suffer a concussion in that fall I have no idea, but it’s a contrived-enough fall without an accidental kiss! Izumi jumps back to his feet and reiterates he doesn’t want to do it with “just anyone” and honestly isn’t even thinking about it that much. Kazusa responds by asking him to say “Willy’s Real Rear Wheel” ten times fast, while she slowly gets up and walks out.

It’s probably going to be like this for a while, as these two are nowhere near on the same wavelength and may not even want the same thing. Things will get even more dire for Kazusa if the more assertive Niina starts cultivating an interest in “Mr. Old Fashioned.”

But whatever hardship befall these five girls (well, four, anyway; Momo barely registers) and Izumi, I’m thoroughly enjoying this highly approachable, engaging, down-to-earth coming-of-age drama that reminds of my own awkward, clueless, stumbling, yearning younger self.

Author: sesameacrylic

Zane Kalish is a staff writer for RABUJOI.