O Maidens in Your Savage Season – 03 – Tough Kids Drink Milo

While Rika is checking a magazine to see how much she actually resembles Erika, Hitoha notices a new book has been published—but not her’s. Her editor says her stories aren’t “realistic” enough. For Hitoha, the message is clear: in order to break onto the young erotic fiction scene, she needs actual experience. So she arranges an IRL meet with “Milo” on the dirty chatroom.

When Izumi talks with Niina in private about the footage she shot, he doesn’t realize how much of a message he sent by taking her arm in class with everyone watching. Still, she’s impressed that he’s quicker on the uptake than she expected, taking her criticism and apologizing rather than bristling.

Even so Niina senses an “old-fashioned” quality to Izumi, and before returning to class (without saying she’d delete the footage) she assures him it’s not just boys who think about “doing it” all the time. Girls think about it too…even Kazusa. And it’s perhaps for that reason that every available male faculty member outright refuses to become the lit club’s adviser, keeping its future in jeopardy.

When Izumi’s mom drags Kazusa in to take home some meatloaf, she asks her to go up to his room to fetch the ketchup. Upon entering (again, without knocking! Girl!), she imagines him with his pants down at the desk again before it fades to an empty chair.

She gets a pang of nostalgia (which must come as a relief) when she sees the DVD for a Ghibli-like film on the desk, but when opening the case, she’s mortified to learn it’s something else entirely: a porn blu-ray, rather inartfully titled The Wheels on the Commuter Bus Go “Oh Yeah, Harder!”

Meanwhile, at the Hongou residence, Hitoha is ready to head out on her date when two misogynists on the TV talk about how mismatching underwear is a turnoff, and steals her sister’s blue bottoms to match her blue bra. As she waits until 1:00pm on the dot to leave the station and head for the statue where she’ll meet her date, she’s understandably nervous, repeating over and over to run if he looks like a shitty (or shitty-looking) guy.

So imagine her shock when “Milo” from the dirty chatroom is a handsome, glasses-less, stylishly-dressed…Yamagichi-sensei! Once he recognizes Hitoha, he bolts. I’d admire him for that, since it means he has no intention of sleeping with Hitoha, but then I wonder how he’d have reacted if it was a different girl her age, and immediately lose the ability to admire him for anything. Regardless, Hitoha follows; she can use this.

Desperate to learn something about sex, especially of the kind between the flowery literature or crass commuter bus porn (that’s quite a range), Kazusa beseeches her parents, who proceed to misunderstand her question and tell her about the day she was born, not the night they conceived her. They’re as ill-prepared to have “the talk” with their daughter as she is to ask them about it. Meanwhile, next door, Izumi panics over his lost porn…until he remembers Kazusa was in his room.

The next day, the principal and vice-principal, clearly scared of young women having a free and open forum to discuss literature of a mildly lascivious nature, are ready to pull the plug on the lit club after their unsuccessful search for an adviser, when Hitoha bursts into the office with a defeated, blackmailed Yamagishi by her side. He’ll be advising the club.

After Yamagishi eloquently analyzes Hitoha’s reading in the club, she twists the knife a little by giving him the same nickname in club (Milo-sensei)as his chatroom name, assuming it comes from Venus de Milo. Before he drives off, she thanks him for letting them continue the club, but he corrects her: he got it from something much more innocent: “Tough Kids Drink Milo,” the slogan of Nestle’s Milo chocolate drink (a personal favorite of mine…I guess I’m a tough kid!)

That evening, with the Norimotos apparently out, Kazusa uses the spare key to slip in and return Izumi’s porn DVD, but before doing so, has another ephiphany, realizing that her childhood friend, ever a lover of transportation, chose a commuter bus porn DVD rather than tarnish his even more beloved trains. Just as when she initially noticed the misleading Ghilbi case, Kazusa feels relieved, even happy that Izumi hasn’t changes as much as she thought.

It’s very sweet moment—and pretty hilarious!—moment. And then Izumi enters his room, correcting her on the format: it’s a Blu-Ray, not a DVD.

He goes on to try to explain and clarify that while he does watch porn (something now painfully clear), that doesn’t mean he’s interested in doing it with anyone; not Asada or any of the other girls at school, and not her, either. No doubt he probably doesn’t think he’s hurting Kazusa with those words, but he cuts her to the quick, and as her eyes well up she races out of the room, so fast that she stumbles down the stairs, and Izumi tumbles after her.

He lands on top of her at the bottom of the stairs, his face just an inch from her’s. How Kazusa doesn’t suffer a concussion in that fall I have no idea, but it’s a contrived-enough fall without an accidental kiss! Izumi jumps back to his feet and reiterates he doesn’t want to do it with “just anyone” and honestly isn’t even thinking about it that much. Kazusa responds by asking him to say “Willy’s Real Rear Wheel” ten times fast, while she slowly gets up and walks out.

It’s probably going to be like this for a while, as these two are nowhere near on the same wavelength and may not even want the same thing. Things will get even more dire for Kazusa if the more assertive Niina starts cultivating an interest in “Mr. Old Fashioned.”

But whatever hardship befall these five girls (well, four, anyway; Momo barely registers) and Izumi, I’m thoroughly enjoying this highly approachable, engaging, down-to-earth coming-of-age drama that reminds of my own awkward, clueless, stumbling, yearning younger self.

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GATE – 11

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This was a pretty good episode of GATE; a vibrant episode thankfully bereft of real-world leaders and full of transition and change, opening five months after Itami & Co returned to the Special Region. The area around the military base and refugee camp is now a bustling town and a melting pot of Special Regioners and JSDF.

Pina continues the diplomacy, bringing a minister from Japan to work with the Imperial elites to negotiate a peaceful resolution, and as an old elf continues to struggle in the present, there’s a new elf on the block who has a mission only the JSDF can pull off.

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First, Tuka: Itami’s subordinate Mari wants to do more to help Tuka, who’s spent much of the last five months wandering the new town, looking for her dead father. Mari wants to make Tuka see reality so she can move forward, but Itami basically tells her not to rock the boat, because Mari doesn’t know she will be around to support Tuka indefinitely. No one knows what the future holds, so Itami is content with the status quo for now. Mari is understandably frustrated with Itami, but agrees not to do anything.

Having checked in on the Tuka situation (and even more briefly on Lelei, who looks disheveled but content in her modern clothes) we shift to Rory, still stubbornly donning her gothic lolita garb and trying to sleep with Itami. Itami, while flattered, still has an issue with Rory looking like a child, even if she’s 27 times older than him.

Her evening plans are foiled for good by the appearance of a new dark elf character, who also mistakes Rory for a child. Interestingly Rory plays along by pretending to be a child, putting Itami in a spot and forcing him to beat a hasty retreat when the elf draws her sword. I like how Rory takes her frustrations out on both the elf and Itami.

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We learn this dark elf is named Yao Haa Dushi, continuing the show’s George Lucas-style approach to fantastical-sounding names. Her misunderstanding about Rory is forgivable because she’s on a noble quest to meet with the JSDF. Her village has been attacked by a fire dragon, and she needs the “green people” to help finish it off. She doesn’t intend for them to work for free, either: she’s brought a ginormous adamantite crystal as payment; a material that doesn’t even exist beyond the Gate in Japan, which makes it very valuable.

Yao spends the night in a beautiful forest on the town outskirts, dreams of the village attack, and then wakes up to the sound of practice-dogfighting JSDF fighter jets screaming through the sky. It’s a sight that’s full of awe and majesty, and convinces Yao the JSDF are indeed the people who can save her village.

She’s convinced again when she spots a dual-rotor cargo helicopter zoom overhead. Itami is aboard that chopper, which is packed with goods from Japan furnished by the ministry of foreign affiars, who regard such items as ammo in the fight to turn Imperial hawks into Senatorial doves.

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