The Apothecary Diaries – 06 – Poison, as a Treat

Maomao soon learns the extent to which an imperial garden party consists of a lot of standing around freezing your ass off. Even with the pocket warmers she prepared, it’s still cold out there in the open. The party is also an opportunity for the ladies-in-waiting of the four concubines to engage in petty sniping.

When Maomao sees that one of Lihua’s ladies-in-waiting who is talking shit about her is someone she’d already set straight back in the Crystal Pavilion, so it only takes one extremely unsettling look (while covering her lack of freckles) to cause her to flee in terror. She’s definitely gotten the hang of putting jerks in their place!

Maomao also learns, and is rightfully skeeved out, by the fact that the emperor’s youngest consort, Lishu, was technically his oldest consort Ah-Duo’s mother-in-law, despite being all of nine years old when she was with the previous emperor. Even now she’s still but fourteen—and her ladies-in-waiting don’t seem to be big fans of her.

When Maomao sees Lihua’s ladies freezing, she offers them some stones, but they recoil from her. That’s fine, because plenty of people like Maomao and show it by offering her hairpins. First there was Jinshi last week, then Lihaku, a Golden Retriever of an officer, and then most surprising of all but then again not, Lady Lihua gives her savior a hairpin. That said, I doubt Maomao is in any hurry to be poached from Gyokuyou.

Maomao’s favorite part of the garden party is the food tasting. The first dish is fine, but she notes that the second is odd in that it contains a different ingredient than usual, and when Lishu eats that same dish a table over, not only does she seem thoroughly troubled by having to eat it, but her food taster seems to be getting a kick out of her discomfort.

When Maomao tastes the next dish, a bowl of soup, Lihaku and the other officers watch, transfixed. For a second, I thought from her reaction to the taste of the soup that it contained another aphrodisiac, perhaps meant to embarrass her lady. But no, it’s just straight-up poison. Maomao just gets off being poisoned, or poisoning herself. The more the poison courses through her body, the more excited she gets.

Hey, I ain’t here to kink-shame, but the fact she swallows the poison soup calls into doubt whether it’s actually poison, so a minister tries some and collapses. By that point, Maomao has rushed to the fountain to wash out her mouth, but Jinshi is still concerned.

Maomao gives him her sweetest doe eyes and asks if she can have more poison, but he’s not there to enable her. As he takes her by the hand to the infirmary for a proper purge, she notes that he’s acting more adult while ironically appearing younger; she notes that she “prefers him like this, somewhat,” but when she sees that even he has a hairpin, her mind wanders who gave it to him.

Once Maomao has taken “the good drugs” and purged all traces of the poison from her body, she asks Jinshi to bring Lady Lishu and her taster before her for some questions. Almost immediately upon arriving, Lishu strarts scratching at her sleeve, which Maomao lifts to reveal a nasty rash.

Maomao has seen this before, including with her own body: she doesn’t use the words “allergic reaction”, but she understands what’s happening and that it’s caused by certain foods. In her case, it’s buckwheat, but in Lishu’s case, it’s mackerel.

Maomao goes on to note that Lishu and Gyokuyou’s dishes must have been swapped, and she gives Lishu’s food taster a good long stern look and gives her a list of things to avoid if she wants to keep Lishu alive and happy. Maomao leaves out the “…or else you’ll fell the wrath of the emperor”, because that’s implied.

And so not long after saving Lady Lihua from toxic makeup, she’s saved Lady Lishu from a negligent food taster. She continues to demonstrate her indispensable ability to identify causes of problems and formulating solutions.

She may not know who poisoned the soup, but it’s another instance in an ongoing pattern of incidents Jinshi is keeping a close eye on, and I’m sure he’ll continue to rely on Maomao for council where medicine is concerned, while also ensuring she doesn’t get overexcited and kill herself with that sweet, sweet poison.

Hyakkano – 06 – Uniquely Wonderful

Karane didn’t want to go to a water park, but Hakari suggested it, and she didn’t object. Now she’s looking at cute swimsuits, thinking none of them would look cute. But while she’s pure tsundere outside, unfortunately for the clerk, she chooses one she thinks Rentarou might like her in.

When the big day arrives, Hakari is spilling out in her frilly plaid top, Nano has a sophisticated halter, and Shizuka is wearing the standard school one-piece. Karane is the last to emerge from the changing room, but is donning a long robe, claiming to have caught a chill.

Even Hakari suggests they call off the date if not everyone is up for it, but Karane insists they continue, so they do. Shizuka ends up spinning uncontrollably in her floaty ring and is eventually marooned on an island in the middle of the whirlpool, where no one heeds her text-to-speech calls for help.

That leaves Nano and Hakari with Rentarou, and the latter learns that the former can be as bold or bolder than she is when it comes to efficiently demonstrating her “feminine appeal.” This results in both of them placing his hands on their breasts. When they ask who has the better bust, he’s floating in a pool of noseblood. Both try mouth-to-mouth, but only end up kissing him.

When the two seek help from a lifeguard (a male lifeguard; they’re very clear about that!) they come afoul of three guys who think they’re cute. One of them is convinced that a girl’s upper arm is an ideal way to gauge the suppleness of her breasts, but Nano stops him from grabbing Hakari and gouges his eyes.

This angers the other two, who won’t take no for an answer, so Nano volunteers to hang out with them so Hakari can get the lifeguard for Rentarou. That’s no okay with Hakari. Nano may be better in a fight, but she doesn’t think it’s fair she has to endure the advances of the guys.

When Nano says she knows Rentarou would be sad if Hakari was hurt, Hakari tells her he’d feel the same way about Nano, even if she is his newest girlfriend. Thanks to Karane reviving him quite by accident, Rentarou comes between the guys and his girlfriends, who prove they’re both his by kissing him one after the other.

Just as Hakari said, Rentarou thanks Nano for protecting Hakari, but scolds her for taking such a risk. Nano’s demeanor softens, and she shyly apologizes and thanks Rentarou. Karane joins them, so the only question is, where the heck is Shizuka?

She’s still on that island, unable to swim, with a deflated floaty ring, and a dead phone battery. Her only choice is to cry out with her own voice. At first she doesn’t believe it will ever reach his ears, but she underestimates his love.

So she gives it a try, and sure enough Rentarou’s ears instantly pick up her meager cry, hurries to where she is, and princess carries her back to safety. She’s so happy, she kisses him right there in public. Showing that she can be bold too when she wants to.

The only girlfriend who hasn’t kissed Rentarou to this point is Karane, and after all his running around, he takes a break poolside and asks Karane to join him. When they’re alone, he tells her he noticed her looking at Nano and Hakari’s chests, and tells her she shouldn’t feel self-conscious as they are exceptional for their age.

When Karane responds that unlike Shizuka she’s not tiny and cute but tall, not cute or dainty nor “hot.” Like ripping off a Band-Aid, Rentarou removes her robe in one motion, revealing a white bikini she looks great in. To prove he’s not patronizing her, he draws her into a hug, and she notices his heart is racing even faster than hers.

To Rentarou, it’s not about whose looks are “better or worse”; to him all four of his girlfriends are equally, “uniquely wonderful”. Furthermore, he can’t imagine Karane being any more attractive than she already is. With that, both he and she realize it’s a perfect time to kiss, so they do, all the while thinking about how much they love each other.

With the whole gang back together at last, the pool date can begin in earnest. Nano and Hakari even give Shizuka some swimming lessons! Those dudes who were hitting on Nano and Hakari might call them “freaky” for having the same boyfriend, but while polyamory isn’t for everyone, that doesn’t mean it’s wrong or somehow amoral.

What Rentarou, Karane, Hakari, Shizuka and Nano have together is working for them, so why knock it, except out of jealousy, ignorance, or both? Furthermore, again and again this week Rentarou demonstrated that he’s worthy of having these girlfriends in his life and is dedicated to treating them right, while they’re also looking out for each other.

Just as Rentarou is successfully balancing his four girlfriends, Hyakkano is balancing humor, horniness, and genuine heart. I’d say it’s almost time to introduce the fifth soulmate of this first phase!