Grand Blue – 07 – Just Ask Her Out Directly and Get Rejected, Losers!

Unlike Chio-chan, which mixes its scenarios up pretty well and always keeps you guessing what will befall its characters from week to week, Grand Blue often follows a familiar formula.

In this formula, Iori and Kouhei yell at each other a lot with increasingly contorted faces, while Iori’s college classmates express their disapproval of the very idea of Chisa dating/living with Iori. They’re his friends…until evidence he’s close to Chisa emerges, and then they want to literally kill him.

This act is wearing a bit thin, to be honest, and the reason is in the title of this post: these assholes need to stop blaming Iori for their romantic troubles! If they like Chisa (which is dubious, as none of them actually even know her; they just think she’s cute, which she is), they should ask her out.

If they all get rejected (which they most certainly will be, which lets face it is why they won’t ask), well then, tough noogies! But they’d get closure on the Chisa matter. Instead, they take all their frustrations out on Iori, and we have to watch it. It’s not pleasant, nor is it that funny! Meanwhile, Chisa is pushed off to the side, barely involved aside from the odd glare or blush.

The show flips the script by giving us a doubles tennis competition with the Tinkerbell tennis club, whose blue-haired captain wants revenge for the pageant fiasco. He’s also not interested in playing fair, as he spikes all the booze of Peekaboo’s spectators, as well as the hard-hitting Ryuu and Shinji, with what seems to be Everclear.

In the midst of the matches, we learn that both Chisa and Iori are extremely competent at tennis and would even make fine members of Tinkerbell, if only its captain and other members weren’t such arrogant pricks. I also lked how Chisa punished Iori for his ill-conceived cheers by taking his sweats and wearing them herself.

In any case, Peekaboo manages to pull an upset, netting them enough funds to take a diving trip to Okinawa. Less pathetic, jealous college buddies, more fun diving trips, please! Fulfill the promise of that painfully upbeat opening!

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Grand Blue – 06 – Diving Cures All Ills

Iori remains on bad terms with Chisa, which ends up hurting all the other lads in his German class who were depending on him getting to see her notes. As a result the lads must cheat in other ways, all of which are either discovered by the teacher or ineffective.

While I’m not opposed to episodes made up of isolated segments (see Tsuugakuro, Chio-chan no) I’d prefer if Grand Blue didn’t stray so far from its core themes. This bit felt more like high school than college. Thankfully, we get back on track when Aina is officially initiated into Peek-a-Boo.

Between the binge drinking, the gratuitous nudity, Chisa’s perceived sadism towards Iori, and Nanaka’s perceived fixation on Chisa, Aina quickly learns that no one in the club is remotely normal (including herself; one doesn’t have the nickname “Cakey” bestowed upon her otherwise).

In this regard, the cast is a lot like that of Working!!; everyone has their quirks that make them unique and hopefully, compelling to watch as those quirks bounce off of each other.

Still, the women, particularly Chisa, are pleased and excited that Aina joined because she found diving interesting. It’s here where Iori and Kohei act as a kind of audience surrogate by stating it’s not like they never go diving, but it sure doesn’t seem like they’ve done it in a while…which is very true! It’s been less Grand Blue and more Gorge Booze…

Speaking of, when the party runs out of alcohol, Aina and Chisa volunteer to go out to buy more, and as the saying goes, when the cat’s away, the mice will play.

Despite Aina’s insistence everyone remains clothed and civil for her welcome party, old habits die hard and the lads can’t help themselves from devolving into debauchery in Chisa and Aina’s brief absence.

As for substituting a big log for Pocky in a game between Iori and Kohei, it’s a shade too credulity-stretchingly absurd, even for this show.

While it doesn’t really matter whether Iori and Kohei learn perfect German, it is imperative they memorize all the underwater hand signals, as it could end up saving their life or that of their comrades. So it’s disconcerting to see they don’t know the hand signals any more than they know “rheumatoid arthritis” in German (btw it’s the same, except for an “e” added to make “rheumatoide”).

They end up learning them when a different kind of threat emerges during the party: Nanaka learns her beloved Chisa is dating Iori. This makes Iori fear for his life, and he uses hand signals to alert Kohei and the others. However, Nanaka isn’t certain whether they’re actually dating or whether it simply looks like they are.

So the next day, when the club finally, finally has an actual diving session, she pairs up Iori and Chisa. At first Iori thinks Chisa is angry at him as usual, but she’s really only serious about diving, and not just the safety side, but the fun and wonder of it as well.

Before he knows it Iori is swept up in Chisa’s enthusiasm for the world under the sea, and when he tells her how much fun he had down there, she can’t help but smile. I will always prefer this joyful Chisa to the scornful one dishing out verbal or physical punishment on Iori for acting the goat (however in the right she may be).

Sadly Grand Blue will apparently never let these two remain in a state of detente for long, preferring to built them up and then tear them down for a cheap laugh. As such, Iori ruins it by commenting on the fineness of Chisa’s ass, leading her to blow her top at him. Why can’t we have nice things?

Grand Blue – 05 – Beauty is Only Skin Deep

As punishment(?) for neglecting her at the festival, Chisa puts the word out that she’s dating Iori, immediately making all the other guys at college hate him and wish him ill will in a very over-the-top, repetitive opening act that went on a bit too long.

Chisa does nothing to stop the false rumor—on the contrary, she fans the flames—and Iori tells the guys that Kohei is dating Azusa (making him Public Enemy #2), but they both get a reprieve when they promise to arrange a mixer for them.

Oddly, their job is made easier by the fact the legions of haters are curiously whittled down to just two ornery classmates. To that end, they beg Azusa to introduce them to other women at her college. She agrees, but only if Iori continues to act like Chisa’s boyfriend until, as she puts it, Chisa “accepts it.”

With Iori’s promise secured, Azusa introduces her kohai, none other than Yoshiwara Aina, who the lads find extraordinarily adorable when she’s not wearing the thick layers of makeup that earned her the unwanted nickname “Cakey.”

Aina has wanted to join the diving club anyway since the festival, leaving the tennis club full of fakes who treated her like shit. Despite calling her cakey and drooling over her non-cakey appearance, Aina is still willing to scrounge up three of her friends for the mixer. But she also gives Chisa one hell of a sidelong glance; I believe Chii-chan just got some competition.

The quartet of lads, among them a virgin who will sleep with any girl as long as they’re a girl and he can sleep with her, are shocked to find Aina has somewhat tainted the mixer by giving her three friends as well as herself the same Cakey treatment, giving them the appearance of four clowns.

But if the girls are clowns, the guys are circus animals, constantly jockeying for attention and braying and snorting at one another whenever more than one of them focuses on one girl. Like the lecture hall scene, it gets a bit repetitive.

A look at a selfie shows them one of the girls is quite attractive behind the makeup, and they all go after her, but when Kohei asks her if she’ll come to his place later all four girls retreat to the restroom.

Iori uses the time to inspire his men, only to steal the show, thus invoking the other lads’ collective ire. Kohei breaks a mixer taboo by blurting out that Iori has a girlfriend (something he can’t deny lest he break his promise to Azusa), but the girls don’t even care; they already know that fact.

Later, the girls laugh off the mixer as an entertaining lark, likening it to going to the zoo. But Aina, ever the romantic, still ponders whether the person who saw through her cakey makeup and helped her out when she was down in the dumps could be a good match for her. No doubt she sees a decent guy beneath Iori’s own thick layers of alcohol-soaked machismo.

Steins;Gate 0 – 16 – It’s Not Just a Cheap Coat

Daru and Maho are hard at work on “Phone Microwave (Temporary) Unit-02”; progress is slow and full of smoky setbacks, but neither party has any intention of giving up anytime soon. Meanwhile, in Mayuri’s words, the “normie life” of Rintarou (who has given up on trying to have both Kurisu and Mayuri in his life, without starting WWIII) is taking off, and he can’t tell how left behind she feels.

Rintarou can’t so much have a conversation with her without checking his buzzing phone. He says things like his going to America is “good for everyone”, even though it’s not good at all for her. She decides not to go eat with him, but ends up encountering Ruka, who calls her Rintarou’s “Orihime-sama”, pertaining to Vega and the heroine of the story upon which the Tanabata festival is based.

While the lovers representing Vega and Altair were banished to opposite ends of the galaxy, once a year a flock of magpies forms a bridge for them to meet. Mayuri, who can tell that Rintarou loved/loves Kurisu and not her, can’t subscribe to Ruka’s assertion, and all Ruka can do is offer a handkerchief to dry Mayuri’s tears.

Rintarou suddenly arrives at the lab while Maho is showering and Daru is unprepared. He’s ready to drag Daru along with him to America, but the trash is full of bananas and there’s a curtain covering the back of the lab. A light dawns in Rintarou’s head, and his initial suspicions are proven right when he pulls a bunch of slimy green ‘nanners from the trash.

When he discovers the new Phone Microwave, he whips himself into a damn frenzy trying to remind Daru just how much torture he endured and who died last time the device was constructed. Eventually his rantings are interrupted by Maho (in a towel, at first), but he soon turns on her, going so far as to call her a murderer if she proceeds. That earns him a much-deserved punch to the face.

Once heads have cooled a bit, Rintarou and Maho debate the “laws of the world” and whether messing with them is “challenging God.” While Maho can appreciate and even respect certain aspects of Rintarou’s theory about how the world works, she doesn’t believe humans would have the ability to make a time machine if they were never meant to.

Rintarou rebuts, telling her how she couldn’t possibly understand what it’s like to fail and fail hundreds and thousands of times, which is laughable to us because we know that the entire time Kurisu was alive, Maho was struggling and failing to reach any of the breakthroughs or earn any of the accolades or gain any of the fame her kohai had. But she never gave up then, and she’s not giving up now, no matter how much Rintarou yells at her.

Rintarou skulks off, and by chance, ends up encountering Mayuri in the park where they used to spend a lot of time before they met Daru. She used to wait for Rintarou just as we saw her wait outside his college in the present. What Rintarou doesn’t know, but eventually finds out as she talks, is that Mayuri heard every word in his rant back at the lab about how saving Kurisu meant killing her off.

She also tearfully notes how much he’s looked like he’s suffered ever since he made the decision, which makes her think he might’ve made the wrong choice. There’s no way he can be okay with how things have turned out if he has that look. His eyes have always betrayed how he actually feels. Rintarou is devastated, and tries to tell Mayuri to do the impossible: “not think about it.” Things aren’t that simple, Okarin. The clouds part, revealing Vega and Altair.

This was an emotional powerhouse of an episode, with clashes between characters of an intensity that’s been mostly missing from this season. With those scenes came brilliant performances from Miyano Mamoru, Hanazawa Kana, Seki Tomokazu and Yahagi Sayuri. Also brilliant is the fact that there are no right or wrong answers.

As Daru and Maho search for that one perfect solution to the formula among an infinite possibilities—for the Steins Gate—they must be cognizant of the fact that they are imperfect, lest the despair Rintarou has already experienced not only return, but worsen.

Itsudatte Bokura no Koi wa 10 cm Datta. – 05

Just as Miou has come out of her funk and started to work on her painting of love anew, Haruki develops a profound crisis of identity. He stops coming to school snaps at Saku, and decides he won’t be going to America after all, because he’s now convinced filmmaking was his brother’s dream, not his.

Miou pulls out the ol’ “I’ll wait as long as it takes at the usual spot” to draw Haruki out, as when the snow starts coming down, he worries, correctly, that she’ll be standing out in the cold all alone. There, in their usual spot, the two have it out.

While in the moment I was frustrated with how mean Haruki was being, one has to consider how emotionally unmoored he is, as well as frustrated with how Miou wouldn’t talk or even look at him for so long, only to need to talk now.

Haruki really does need to just cool it with the angst and listen, because Miou has to tell him she was the one Chiaki saved, and to apologize for keeping it from him so long, worried he’d hate her.

Haruki is too busy hating himself to hate Miou, but when he starts talking about what an idiot he is to confuse his brother’s dream with his own, Miou gives him the front of her right hand, breaking the 10cm distance in an instant.

She reminds him two brothers can have the same dreams, and that in all her time watching him, she could tell that Haruki’s dream of directing films was his own, and a powerful one at that, so he should really lighten up!

Miou also shows Haruki her recently completed painting, one of a guy and a girl looking out a window in the classroom. I assume it’s meant to be the two of them, and so the painting serves as a kind of confession of sorts for Miou. Haruki is cheered up, and the two head to his place to get out of the cold.

There, after cocoa, Miou remembers she has a DVD Saku told her to watch with Haruki. It is footage recorded right after Chiaki saved the girl Haruki now knows was Miou; Chiaki tells his little brother he’s filming one of the best scenes a director can film: a person’s moment of victory for having achieved something great (in his case, saving Miou).

Young Haruki promises his brother right there that he’ll follow his dream—yes, his dream of directing—making the DVD video evidence that what Miou said to Haruki is true, and he really does love making films. I guess that means he’ll be heading to America after all…which is bittersweet, since it’ll mean being apart from Miou.

Fuuka – 01 (First Impressions)

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Twitterphile Haruna Yuu has moved to Tokyo with his younger sister to live with his two older sisters. In a misunderstanding, a blue-haired girl breaks his phone; he later transfers to her class. After more interactions, the girl comes to trust Yuu, gives him her name, Akitsuki Fuuka.

She accompanies him to a movie, the theme to which is sung her favorite idol (and Yuu’s childhood friend) Hinashi Koyuki. After a surprisingly pleasant date, Yuu gets a cryptic photo text from Koyuki, asking if he remembers her.

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From the creator of Suzuka and Kimi no Iru Machi (Seo Kouji) comes Fuuka, about a guy with an unconventional family situation, an old friend who is now a celebrity, and a weird but charming girl with which he gets off to a rough start, but gets smoother as the episode progresses.

The episode is the same way, relying on a super-lame upskirt photo-based misunderstanding that’s followed up by a second instance of Yuu pointing his camera at Fuuka and just happening to catch a glimpse of her panties.

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This is a show with the sheen of a serious, naturalistic romantic drama, but too often leans on exaggerated actions and coincidences that strain credulity.

It doesn’t help that while he seems to be a nice guy, Yuu is pretty dull, and is more defined by outward things, like his many sisters who don’t mind being undressed around him, or his patently awful Twitter feed. No one cares what you’re doing every waking moment, brah.

As charming as she is, Fuuka also seems at times to be trying too hard to be the hyper sporty weird girl. Minorin you ain’t, kid.

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Still, neither party is as loathsome as the couple from Kimi no Iru Machi, but I have a feeling the could become so at some point, as the love triangle forms. For now, I’m still barely on the guy’s side. I’m just hoping the fact that Fuuka’s favorite singer being Yuu’s childhood (and likely another love interest as well) doesn’t collapse under the weight of its own coincidence.

The idol herself was only on the margins of the episode, lurking; I imagine we may see more of her in the next episode…which I’ll be reviewing soon, as it aired right after the first. For now, I’m hedging.

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Binbougami ga! – 11

After a hot day, Ichiko needs a bath, but finds hers occupied by a stink god, another of Momiji’s chums. She asks Rindou if she can use hers, but it’s just a steel drum in the yard, so the two resort to the public bath. There they find Keita and his family, and everyone ends up seeing everyone else nude and is nervous about it the next day.

What’s worse than a fanservice episode? One that comes right out in the beginning and points out what it is, thinking it’s clever but coming off as lame and lazy. The bottom line is, this show isn’t really allowed to show anything, so devoting an entire episode to teasing just how close to the edge it can go isn’t all that productive. Worse, Ichiko’s latest development – the amulet that prevents her from absorbing the fortune from others – is totally forgotten this week.

So yeah, 99% of this episode is silly and ridiculous, and not in a good way. For one thing, we were kind of distressed that the monk was trying so hard to peep on the ladies when some of them were small girls. Not cool. Why isn’t he reported to the cops? We did enjoy how Keita turned a shocked Ichiko around after an awkward moment of seeing each other nude, then coyly lying about not seeing anything. Dude, you saw everything. Also, washing Momiji did…something to her. Was her misfortune washed away?


Rating: 4 (Fair)

Kamisama Dolls 11

Mahiru learns from Aki that Kyohei has a girlfriend. Furious, she kidnaps Hibino and ties her up in a hotel room, then visits Kyohei to learn the truth of things. She crushes cookies Utao baked specially for Kirio, leading to a brief fight, and Mahiru teleports away again. Utao, Kyohei and Moyako take Kukuri and pursue her. Meanwhile, Shiba threatens to rape Hibino.

With a title like “Hibino Kidnapped”, it’s pretty obvious what was to in the 24 minutes that followed, but I was expecting…more. I mean, look up a the first paragraph; not a lot happened. Worse still, Mahiru is not the most interesting character to watch for the majority of an episode; she’s only good in short spurts. Here, she yells far too much, repeating a lot of what has already been established. Most notably, she’s in love with her hero, Kyohei. We knew this last week. She’s also threatened by Hibino. We assumed that.

Her idea to unite the Kuga and Hyuga clans by marrying Kyohei and wiping out the old ways makes sense in theory, but isn’t without its problems. For one, Kyohei isn’t a seki anymore, and he has no intention of returning to the village, which is what Mahiru asks him to do here. But all of this could have been done much faster; I feel the momentum has been hurt by spending too much time on the psycho Mahiru, who lost most if not all of the goodwill gained from her first episode. Most frustrating, there are no further developments on precisely what the Diet member has planned, and how Mahiru and Aki fit into that plan. In all, this episode was a regression.


Rating: 3