Heavenly Delusion – 07 – In Your Head

We spend this week totally away Tokio’s side of this story, and since last week the gears turning in my head have be believing we’re dealing with two different timelines. If Tokio and Kona are Maru’s parents, then “Heaven” is a facility that was running just before the Collapse.

This also supports the theory that “Heaven’s” children were the experiments that led to the creation of the Man-Eaters/Hiruko, which caused the Collapse, and why Maru has the power to kill them. Mind you I’ve not read any of the source material, so we’ll see how right or wrong I am!

What’s great about Heavenly Delusion is that the theorizing is fun, but not vital. I’m fine to let mysteries to unravel in their own time, and in the meantime we have this beautiful story of the found family/rom-com duo of  Kiruko and Maru roving the gorgeously rendered ruins of civilization.

This week the pair put their two brain cells together to make a sign advertising their Hiruko-killin’ services, and the show pulls of a nifty bit of misdirection. We’re led for a moment to believe they’re about to be captured by Immortal Order, but they’re actually scooped up by a group zealously opposed to IO, called Liviuman.

Led by the charismatic Mizuhashi, it is an organization that opposes IO’s efforts to replace human bodies with machines and achieve immortality. Mizuhashi herself was the victim of a forced amputation of her leg, and while wandering the facility, encountered a human being chopped in pieces yet still somehow alive enough to beg her to kill them.

That’s some haunting, Mitty-ass shit right there, and sent shivers down my spine, because my mind immediately went to Dr. Usami, the doctor who put Haruki’s brain into his sister’s body (evidence of which is clear when Kiruko is bathing and her hair is back, revealing their head scar). He’s still up to his old tricks.

Kiruko is obviously naked when they’re bathing, and Maru notes that “she” seems “less coolheaded” than usual, like the Haruki in “her” is coming out. Kiruko hops out of the hot bath, stands before Maru in their birthday suit, and declares that they’ve “always” been Haruki in their head. Maru gets in the bath after them, chastened…but also turned on.

The next day, Kiruko and Maru agree to take care of the Hiruko rumored to be located on Immortal Order’s premises. Mizuhashi rallies Liviuman and stages a big loud protest as a diversion, allowing our duo to slip into a well-lit parking lot—a curiosity in a world with no power grid.

As for Hirukos, they find none that are moving, and instead find several small, white growths that appear to be dormant. Maru uses his touch to kill them for real, one after the other, until Kiruko locates the “big boss”. I agree with them that it’s almost more annoying that they aren’t moving, but it’s also far creepier.

When the boss’ face lights up, other Hirukos suddenly spring forth from inside the floor, walls, and ceiling, exhibiting an ability they haven’t seen before. The Kiru-Beam has no effect on the swarming monsters and runs out of juice. Kiruko is set upon by one, then two, then five of the little blighters.

Then, the unthinkable happens. One of the Hirukos grabs hold of her harm with its blade-filled mouth and bites down hard. Her arm is chomped off; then one of her feet. Maru is several yards away, similarly overwhelmed. Kiruko can’t do anything.

Fearing this might be the end, Kiruko calls out for Robin to help before passing out. But then they comes to…with Maru kissing them. He’s doing so to snap Kiruko out of what was apparently a hallucination; the boss Hiruko hypnotized her into thinking Hirukos were everywhere and making them shoot at nothing.

If Maru wasn’t there—and immune to the hypnosis—Kiruko might’ve been toast for real. That said, they still don’t let Maru sneak another kiss—one was enough, and they acknowledge it was necessary to snap them out of their trance. But goddamn was that nightmarish and stressful. I honestly didn’t know if Kiruko was actually being horribly maimed before our eyes.

With all the dormant Hiruko killed, Kiruko and Maru start to hear the approaching footsteps of fine black wingtips. A man in a well-fitting black suit, lavender tie, and eyepatch appears, holding a gun and inspecting the dead Hiruko. He then turns to the duo, and his gun clacks as he does.

That said, he doesn’t pull the gun on them. Instead, he asks them if they can kill something else for him. Kiruko says sure, if they can, and depending on what exactly he wants. She also mentions she’s looking for Dr. Usami, and the much younger man than she knew says that he’s Dr. Usami.

Clearly, the not-good-at-all doctor’s research on immortality has borne some fruiton on a personal level. We’ll have to wait until next week to learn the unspeakable but inevitable human cost, and if we’re actually dealing with a post-“Heaven” scenario in which Maru is the son of that facility’s residents.

TONIKAWA: Over the Moon For You – S2 04 – The Kiss List

One of the many reasons Tsukasa loves Nasa so much is that he’s extremely reliable. He may not be the strongest guy, but whether it’s fixing Kaname’s vacuum or helping Aya avoid failing the year at high school, he earnestly helps out those in need without any thought of getting anything in return. He’s also modest, grateful to and respectful of those who came before him, like the great minds who developed the math he’s teaching the somewhat less great-minded Aya.

After preparing some worksheets that will help Aya with self-study, Nasa goes on to work on a project for a vtuber friend. Tsukasa can see that he must be stiff from sitting cross-legged and typing for such an extended time, so she insists her husband lie down so she can give him a massage.

Nasa admits this is his first massage, which makes Tsukasa happy since “she’ll be his first”. She’s also quite good. Not only does Nasa feel great because his muscles and joints are being taken care of, he also feels another kind of way that a husband feels when his wife is touching him.

He wants Tsukasa to feel good too, so when she’s done, Nasa insists she have a seat so he can massage her. She’s nervous, so only allows him to give her a shoulder massage, as long as he’s gentle. Nasa realizes he’s never touched his wife in this way, and that he feels just as good massaging her as he felt when she massaged him.

As we know Tsukasa and Nasa are not the most physically intimate couple, and a lot of the, shall we say, physical activities in which most loving couples engage both before or after marriage, don’t come easily. That said, day by day, little by little, they are becoming more comfortable with each other. That has a lot to do with how kind they know each other to be.

It’s ultimately Kaname’s conniving that jump-starts their physicality, as one day out of the blue she rudly asks Nasa how many times he and Tsukasa kiss and do it per day. She also informs him she’s been diving into the depths of blue YouTube, something I’m sure Nasa doesn’t want her talking about.

However, when Kaname produces a list she wrote up that indicates the various meanings of kisses to different parts of the body. Neck, ear, hand, hair…each kiss sends a different message. While Nasa isn’t comfortable discussing this with Kaname, he also doesn’t refuse the list she prepared.

That list makes Nasa’s subsequent interactions with Tsukasa a little tenser than usual, since he can’t un-read the list, and thus knows what he’d be “saying” to Tsukasa were he to kiss her here or there. When the two go out for an evening stroll after a grocery run, she catches him smelling her hair as it flows in the night air.

Tsukasa tells him he can touch her hair if he wants, so he does, though she’s a little weary of being seen out in the open. Nasa assures them it’s dark and “should be fine”, so the hair-touching commences. It’s interrupted when the two spot Yanagi-sensei with Taniguchi-sensei, who have clearly hit it off since they’re now going on evening strolls…and kissing.

When the bashful couple returns home, Tsukasa is given some green grapes by Kaname…along with the list of kisses. Nasa decides to use the opportunity to kiss her on the throat, indicating need. She counters with a kiss to the ear: seduction.

Gradually, the two start making out by kissing various parts of their bodies—while remaining fully clothed, and without getting too amorous, mind you! It’s cute as hell, and precisely the kind of stready yet significant progress one would expect of a couple still feeling their way though that aspect of their marriage.

TONIKAWA: Over the Moon For You – S2 02 – Love You Can Taste

Yanagi’s class-wide grades have fallen since her top student Yuzaki Nasa left. But there’s nothing she can do about that, so she works as hard as she can to make up for the loss. That means giving all of herself to her job and declining dates from co-workers.

That night while buying ramen at the konbini, Yanagi-sensei happens to run into Nasa. When she sees the ring she immediately panics, assuming he’s been snatched up by some delinquent. But when Nasa takes her home to meet Tsukasa and they feed her her best dinner in months, Yanagi’s opinion of her changes drastically. Nasa and Tsukasa’s love is so intense and natural that it makes food taste better.

Another party initially unaware of Nasa’s nuptuals is Onimaru Ginga, who storms into the bathhouse demanding to know where Nasa is. Tsukasa goes on the defense, matching Ginga word for word in posturing and verbal sparring. Kaname is frightened of Ginga, but Tsukasa is scared of nothing and nobody, and a slow, painful death awaits anyone who’d hurt her Darling.

Fortunately, Ginga’s not only a nice guy, but Nasa’s younger cousin who followed him around like a lost puppy growing up. He admires Nasa, and with good reason: Nasa’s great! He’s also in high school, and the yakuza is a chuunibyou-like delusion, wherein every activity he describes sounds like crimes but is translated by Nasa to be perfectly harmless high school stuff, like trying to find a home for an abandoned kitten.

While the kitten is (understandably) freaked out and hostile, once the vet is done his checkup and the little guy has been cleaned and groomed, he settles down, and Nasa and Tsukasa agree to take him in for now (i.e., forever). Tsukasa names him Toast, since the blotch on his back resembles a pat of butter. Thus the Yuzaki family grows by one tiny fuzzy member.

Tomo-chan Is a Girl! – 13 (Fin) – No Complaints

The twelfth episode was so good, thirteen was going to be all gravy…as long as it didn’t undo what twelve started. That’s the one fatal mistake it could make that would sour the entire season for me. At the same time, I didn’t want the epilogue to be too fluffy. This show was so good at really digging into its characters and making them think and act in believable and compelling ways.

The episode delivered on both of these conditions, and then some. Yes Tomo and Jun are on the same page regarding their feelings, but they don’t just ease straight into a GF/BF situation at the drop of a hat. This is a transitional period, with all its excitement for what’s to come, and a few speed bumps along the way.

Jun is so relaxed, she’s so nervous, and she and Jun are getting along so well, Tomo confides to Misuzu and Carol that she feels like she lost to Jun for harboring anxieties. when they know all too well he’s harboring them to but sometimes better at hiding them. She wants to throw him off balance to even the playing field. Misuzu suggests they see a romantic film.

Now that the confessions are out of the way, it’s great to really see Jun take to boyfriend mode with aplomb. He may be self-critical, but his direct honest manner is part of what made Tomo fall for him, and that’s on display as he praises her cute look, gives her “T” earrings for Christmas, and immediately dons the muffler she knitted for him.

Throughout the date, Tomo notices that Jun is incredibly focused. He softens when saying that he never really connected with romance movies before, and considers that falling for Tomo made them resonate more. When they’re about to part ways, Tomo has to make a move, and she does: inviting herself to Jun’s house.

What ensues is a wonderfully awkward and all-too-relatable scene of two people who like each other, but have never been in this type of situation, kinda freezing with nervousness and self-consciousness. Tomo again asks to sit next to Jun on his bed, but eventually snaps and tells him she came there for a sole purpose: to kiss him.

Jun admits he wants to to that stuff too, but her father told him he couldn’t go out with her until he defeated him. This is an entirely unfair bargain, as even Jun is no match for Tomo’s dad, a legit master and gigantic dude. Even her dad seems to know he kinda fucked up royally, but you can tell he did it out of love and not a desire to control her life.

But miserable as he is (Tomo confronts him and then tells him she hates him—perhaps a first in their relationship as father and daughter) he can’t take back what he said. A warrior’s word being their bond aside, Jun has heard the challenge and can’t ignore it.

While Tomo was being coy about her intentions to, in so many words, “spice things up” by trying to “beat” Jun to a kiss, Jun makes a rookie BF mistake by keeping something extremely important (her dad’s challenge) from her. Everyone (including her dad) erred, but she and Jun are well-developed enough that you totally understand why they erred.

In the midst of all this relationship turmoil, Misuzu and Carol are left out of the lurch, as Tomo doesn’t contact them for all of winter break. Again, this is rookie relationship behavior, getting so involved that your time with your friends dwindles or vanishes. It’s something Tomo can learn from, and in the meantime, both the girls and Kousuke are willing to hear her problems and offer possible solutions.

Misuzu suspects that Tomo isn’t content to watch the two most important men in her life slug it out while she waits passively. No, if Jun thinks he has to do this, he needs all the encouragement he can get, so she comes to the dojo in the middle of their fight.

This gives Jun a far bigger boost than Tomo realizes, because while he no longer regards her from a high pedestal, there’s still a good amount of that adoration for her, such that he believes he can’t stand still for a moment lest she get too far away from him.

His inferiority issues don’t magically disappear now that they both know each others’ feelings. Instead, he holds himself to an even higher standard. Jun, despite not being the sharpest tack on the board, realizes her dad is leaving openings on purpose to compel him to come in close to deliver a crushing blow, at great risk to himself.

Tomo’s dad knows Tomo will rush ahead. He wants to make sure Jun is someone who won’t just watch adoringly, but run beside her, and back her up in this rhetorical hero scenario. Jun doesn’t know if he can put his life on the line for a stranger, but for Tomo? He’ll walk through the gates of hell.

Jun wins the duel with Tomo’s dad by delivering what would have been a knockout punch if his opponent had been anyone else. But when her dad still won’t go down (even though his hand touched the ground), her mom finishes him off with a brutal smackdown. Jun is the winner, and Tomo leaps into his arms with abandon.

With that symbolic hurdle out of the way, Tomo and Jun are free to go out. When Jun interrupts Tomo to tell her he loves her and asks her to go out with him, she curses him for beating her to it. Her punishment is to take things a step further, so she gives him a big old smooch on the lips, in the perfect time and place.

Their kiss mirrors the poster of the movie they saw, and while they’re still far from ready for some of the later steps the movie couple took after the kissing, this is still a huge deal for these two. The floodgates of love are open, some initial stumbling blocks have been overcome, and they’re poised to begin a race that will continue for the rest of their lives together: the race to make each other’s hearts race faster.

Urusei Yatsura – 23 (Fin) – They’re All Winners

The season 1 finale of Urusei Yatsura is given over entirely to the Tomo-1 Queen Contest teased last week. Seemingly entirely arranged by Ataru, it’s a multi-faceted competition that draws upon the myriad skills and specialties of its five finalists: Lum, Shinobu, Ran, Sakura, and Ryuunosuke. None of them are especially enthusiastic about participating, but a 150,000 yen prize is nothing to sneeze at.

The challenges range from “guess what’s in the box” (Ten with a watermelon, guessed by Ryuu) to bottomless ramen bowls (won by noted glutton Sakura), culminating in a five-woman final battle in which everyone dons wrestling boots and swimsuits (though Ryuu eschews a bikini top for the traditional binding). Knowing she’s at a strength disadvantage, Ran kisses Ryuu, Shinobu, and Sakura, sapping their energy.

That backfires spectacularly, as the five women aren’t fighting each other per se, they have to go up against five wild beasts from the local zoo (Ataru ensured the event was heavily promoted and full of advertisements). For some reason, the beasts are anthropomorphic, otherwise they’d tear our girls to bits.

When Sakura gets ensnared in an Anaconda’s grip, Lum buys time with her electro-kicks for Ran to re-kiss everyone she kissed and give them back their superhuman strength. The battle finishes with all five women teaming up to K-O all five beasts.

Then, curioulsy, the judges determine that the result of the Queen Contest is a five-way-tie, due in part (or rather mostly) because they forgot to keep score as the battle royale got more chaotic. Ataru presents the consolation prize: 30,000 yen worth of takoyaki waffles, and then all the series’ characters come out of the woodwork to join the lunacy. Even Kurama, who hasn’t been seen in months, makes an appaearance.

At the end of the day, the one to profit the most is Ataru, thanks to all the kickbacks he got from the businesses he advertised throughout the contest. As he counts his money, Lum voices her frustration, and Ataru ends up tripping and almost falling straight into a kiss with Lum. Their lips are only inches apart before Ataru withdraws.

Before Lum can get her Darling to declare her the “Queen of his heart”, a still-furious Sakura and Shinobu track him down to beat the stuffing out of him for everything he made them go through. As they chase him into the sunset, with Lum taking flight to join the pursuit, the sun sets on Urusei Yatsura, but only for now.

After the credits, Ataru and Lum announce a Part 2 will air in 2024. As it’s been a great-looking diversion for these last twenty-three weeks, I see no reason not to tune back in!

Tenten Kakumei – 12 (Fin) – In Rainbows

Last week ended with the promise of an unprecedented duel between Anis and Euphie, to decide who will become queen by being made to suffer in one form or another: Anis having to give up everything she is, or Euphie losing everything she has. Both want the other to be happy, neither wants to hurt the other. The duel, while only occupying five minutes, is nevertheless epic in is presentation (like a great boss battle, only between two bosses!) and in the catharsis it provides.

The duel ends quickly because, well, Euphylia Magenta is the titular Genius Young Lady: even with her Dragon Power, Anis’ magicology is simply no match for its power or beauty. And as Euphie repeats when Anis comes to in her lap (a nice callback to a simpler time), she’s only this way because Anis is the one who helped unlock who she is today; someone who won’t hesitate to claim the throne.

And Anis admits, she’s not okay with being queen. She was mostly doing it out of obligation to her parents, to whom she felt she was a “useless daughter”. After the duel, Anis father is holding back tears and her mother isn’t, drawing Anis into a warm embrace and insisting that no, it’s she who is unworthy of having such a splendid daughter.

That night, Anis visits Euphie in her bedroom, and decides the time is right to tell her, and no one else, her deep dark secret. No, it’s not that she’s gay; that’s quite established. Rather, it’s the fact she recalls having a previous life in another world. When she found herself in a world of magic, it felt like a dream, but then she became consumed with fear that she’d somehow replaced the real Princess Anisphia, and was a fake.

Euphie vehemently dispels that notion in no uncertain terms. There is simply no way in her mind that an Anisphia that delivered her from the depths of despair, and showed her what true freedom and happiness looked like, could ever be called a “fake”. She then takes the initiative and kisses Anis, surprising her. Anis insists that’s only something someone should do to someone they love, and Euphie says she does love her.

When Anis tries to qualify that, Euphie says she can be her friend and confidante and comrade, but she’d also like Anis to accept her feelings for what they really are. Before Anis knows it, she’s being thrown on the bed, and the camera tastefully withdraws out of focus.

However far these two lovebirds get that night, or what nature of pillow talk they engage in thereafter, by morning they’re ready to chart the course of the future of their kingdom. Euphie has successfully contracted with the spirit, so the king adopts her and then announces his intent to step back. Euphie will be queen, and Anis will support her as her “older sister”.

For some reason I envisioned undergoing to contract to immediately cause Euphie to not only forget everyone she ever knew but forget that she forgot, but that only happens after a number of lifetimes. With that fear allayed, my original plan for them to basically rule together while keeping their romance private seems to be the one they’ve adopted.

Euphie states in no uncertain terms she’ll be the last monarch chosen by traditional means, as she intends to end the nobility’s monopoly on magic and help Anis realize the dream of magic for everyone, everywhere. That said, Queen Euphie wishes to gently disassemble those old walls, not tear them down, so she and Anis prepare a gaudy, upbeat public demonstration of both the new flying machines and dresses that can enable the wearer to fly.

This is made possible after intense negotiations with the spirit faithful (who by their own precepts must grudgingly follow the will the monarch the spirits chose) and collaboration with Anis’ commoner craftsmen. But they manage to pull off one hell of a show.

As they take flight hand in hand, strike Magical Girl poses, and conjure a literal rainbow, we can see the immediate effect it has on the children of commoners. They run along the ground pretending to fly, but when they’re old enough, they’ll be able to fly too.

Now that the promise and possibility and potential of magicology is now out in the world and Euphie is firmly installed and accepted and celebrated as the new queen, her and Anis’ magical revolution can begin in earnest. It likely won’t be quite the instant success the demonstration indicated, but after that strong a start they can take their time making the world a place where freedom and happiness are available to anyone.

They can also take their time with their romance, as illustrated when Anis looks across the breakfast table at Euphie, Alia, and Lainie, the very picture of bliss. And as they run out for their next appointments, Anis gives Euphie a chaste peck on the cheek, to which Euphie responds with another kiss on the mouth.

Led by the love in their hearts for the kingdom, for magic, and above all for each other, Queen Euphylia and Princess Anisphia a poised to create a new and better world. And if we never see them in anime form again, I could’ve scarcely asked for a better way to close the book on their story. I just hope Anis’s research into immortality doesn’t take any macabre turns!

RABUJOI WORLD HERITAGE LIST

Urusei Yatsura – 18 – Love Is Chemical War

Our episode starts with a needless mini-recap of who Ataru and Lum are, and then we’re off to a sequence where Lum very carefully prepares a very special lipstick in the onboard lab of an orbiting Oni spaceship. It’s special because it enables whoever wears it to be drawn to someone else wearing it like a magnet.

Lum is sick of her Darling never being kissy-kissy with her, but underestimates his speed and agility when he doesn’t want to be kissed. My question to him is, what is so wrong with Lum that he can’t accept her as a partner? I guess it really is about the having, not the getting.

To that end, Ataru pretends to throw the lipstick out the window, but secretly takes it to school to use on the cutest honey available. It’s kind of cruel to give her something she thinks is in good faith, but Ataru pays for it since her fists and feet get to his face before her lips do. With Mendou wanting to kiss Lum and all the girls wanting to kiss him, chaos ensues.

When the class votes to do yaminabe, a kind of potluck hot pot in which you’re allowed to put anything you want in the pot, Lum again breaks out the heavy equipment to make a bizarre complextion that resembles a bit konpeitou, but when both a dog and Ataru taste it, their mouths (and other orifices) become red and inflamed.

Turns out Lum, and likely all Oni, prefer incredibly spicy food (she guzzles habanero sauce with glee). One wonders, then, why she’d hate garlic of all things. I guess it’s less the heat and more the unique odor. Ataru stuffs himself with garlic, but by the time he gets to his room where Lum is, she has an air freshener spray at the ready to counteract his funk.

Lum really gets into the spirit of yaminabe by putting all the things she likes in the pot, including one of her special spicy candies. This renders most of the pot inedible to all, and only she, Atari, and Shinobu are still upright by the end of the first few minutes.

In a game where you have to eat what you take out of the pot with your chopsticks, Shinobu gets fish bones, Lum gets a wooden sandal, and Ataru actually gets the “chomchomp”, a vegetable Ten specifically got for him from a passing interplanetary grocery vender. True to its name, the chomchomp ends up trying to eat Ataru.

It’s a week with another pair of fairly diverting skits, but far from any serialized character development, if anything Ataru and Lum have gone backwards; at best, they’re standing still as a couple.

I know, I know; this resolutely isn’t the kind of show that cares about character development, in fact, its characters are meant to be awful jerks who never learn. But that makes the times it looks like Lum and Ataru have turned a corner sting all the more when they essentially reset in the next skit or episode.

Vanitas no Carte – 14 – Nu au Coin du Feu

Jeanne’s complex relationship with Vanitas gains a new layer as she rescues him from dying of exposure, finds a cabin, and orders him to disrobe. The two sit by the fire together, naked under a blanket. While she’s most often disgusted by his usual arrogance and terseness, she can’t help but find this vulnerable side of him refreshing…even cute.

On the surface, nothing she does for Vanitas is with romantic or amorous intent—even feeding him water with her mouth—she’s just helping to save someone who helped her. But it’s impossible to ignore their history together thus far—all their scenes here are sexy as hell. Vanitas even tells her that they want different things: he wants to save the Beast and she’s been ordered to execute it.

That makes them foes in this enterprise, and she’d be better off letting him die. Of course, Jeanne isn’t going to do that. Instead, she tells Vanitas why she feels responsible not just for getting Vanita’s wounded by a poisoned blade, but for the whole Beast of Gevaudan affair. When she was a little girl, she met the vampire Chloé d’Apchier while left in the care of the Marquis d’Aphcier. Chloé was like a big sister and Jeanne loved her, but that no longer matters: she’s killed scores of people, and must now answer for it.

The reason Jeanne is here is that she failed the first time, but Ruthven gave her a second (and probably last) chance to do it. The next morning, when Jeanne is far more flustered than the fully-recovered Vanitas by the previous evening’s activities, she finds him speaking with Johan, and eventually Dante shows up as well. After threatening both Dhams to tell him everything about this Beast situation, he bids the four of them make haste to the castle to retrieve Noé.

Vanitas is right to worry—Noé wakes up in an unfamiliar bed with the tiny vampire lying on top of him sucking his blood. Despite Chloé being tiny, Noé is so weakened from the battle that he can barely move, leaving him completely at her mercy. If she wants another taste of his blood (and the memories it reveals—though that’s not touched upon here), there’s nothing stopping her…

Except for her attendant, Jean-Jacques, who scolds her for sucking someone’s blood without their consent while also expressing deep loathing for the owner of the other neck she bit. That said, JJ presents Noé with a safe-and-sound Murr and his freshly cleaned and mended clothes. When Noé meets Chloé and JJ in the banquet hall, they’re accompanied by a troupe of musical automatons…along with Naenia.

It addition to being its usual sexy self, this episode of Vanitas added texture to what had initially been labeled a simple mission of kill-or-save the Beast. Chloé is an intriguing potential antagonist, but despite her apparent alliance to Naenia doesn’t come off as pure evil; she was kind to Jeanne, after all.

Instead, as is typical of ancient vampires, she seems to float over everything and everyone, seeking nothing but entertainment and satisfaction out of this scenario…a balm for the ennui of the centuries.

Shin no Nakama – 09 – Warm Hands, Full Hearts

Ruti takes Tisse and their Fisher-Price airship and head for Zoltan to break an alchemist out of jail. Why is the Hero abandoning the rest of her party to do crimes? Because the goatman gave her a sample of the Devil’s Blessing, which weakens her Hero’s Blessing and makes her more human.

She wants a steady supply of the drug, and she trusts Tisse. We get more time with the tiny assassin than all previous episodes combined, and thanks to the legendary Kugimiya Rie (Tisse’s seiyu) and the adorable Crawly Wawly, all of that time is a delight. This is an episode full of jokes that keep things light, unlike the last two weeks where all the self-serious plotting got on my nerves.

I also said the last two weeks that all I really care about is the main couple, but that’s not true; I always cared about Ruti and was fascinated by the curse of her Blessing, and now I care about her and Tisse, who hides the fact that she’s a sweaty bundle of nerves beneath her cool exterior.

Speaking of cool, Winter has come to Zoltan, and business at Red and Rit’s is slow since people don’t want to leave their homes. Rit suggests Red craft a hand warmer similar to the ones form Loggervia, and they’re a big hit in town. Rit saves one warmer for her and Red to share, strolling until they find a private park bench where they  can cuddle and smooch.

That’s the good stuff right there: the Quiet Life of the show’s very long title that both OP and ED promise and that drew me to this show to begin with. That said, that coziness blends well with the gently building tension as Ruti and Tisse get closer to Zoltan, but don’t run into Red and Rit immediately.

In fact, both Ruti and Red end up dealing with the same bridge knight seeking to challenge anyone who crosses. Ruti easily dispatches him into the river where he loses all of his possession. When he challenges Red in nothing but his bear boxers, Red does the same thing, and he loses he boxers too.

Tisse encounters Red first, not knowing who he is when they’re sitting beside each other at a very chill udon stand. As both are seasoned professionals, they quickly but discreetly size one another up and determine that they could be trouble; Tisse because she’s a capable assassin, and Red because Tisse can tell he’s a far stronger knight than the one who lost his drawers.

As expected, Ruti has no trouble at all executing a prison break and extracting Godwin, the alchemist, who will make as much of whatever Ruti wants if she just stops staring at him. The next morning Tisse wakes up to find Ruti didn’t sleep…but you get the feeling if she had enough Devil’s Blessing, she could, and she wants to.

What leads Ruti and Red to finally cross paths at the very end of the episode is nothing contrived, but a practical matter of Ruti not wanting to heal Godwin’s wounds with her Hero’s magic lest her cover be blown. For that, she needs an apothecary, and Tisse, who had already scouted the whole place, knows where the best one is.

What Ruti didn’t know is that the apothecary is the same guy who she met at the udon stand. Fresh from a fairy hamlet on Zoltan’s outskirts where he healed a very blue, very pretty, very naked undine from a cold-like curse that seems to be going around, there he is, welcoming new customers. When Ruti and Red lock eyes and realize that fate has brought them together, Ruti can’t conceal her overflowing happiness.

With tears of joy in her eyes and a huge smile, she pounces on her onii-chan with abandon. I suspect the beautiful reunion will be somewhat marred once Red learns Ruti is in Zoltan to procure drugs that make her a weaker hero. In any case, this week was a marked improvement on the previous two.

The Hidden Dungeon Only I Can Enter – 02 – Coasting Along in Easy Mode

Noir was accepted to Hero Academy, but the 300,000-rel tuition is too-steep for his baronet father, so he has to come up with the cash by himself. At no point did I doubt he’d be able to do so by the end of the episode. Olivia suggests he becomes an adventurer, so he registers with Odin, which just happens to be Olivia’s guild.

The receptionist Lola is skeptical of Noir’s claims, even going so far as to say she’ll lift her skirt up if he’s proven right by the Discerning Tome. Of course he’s proven right, and Lola is a woman of her word…but what a weird wager! It’s almost as if she knows she’s in an ecchi harem show.

Someone who’s known all along what kind of show this is is Emma, who soon joins Noir out in the field. He successfully catches a bunch of rainbow caterpillars to the tune of 250,000 rel, and his success seems to turn Lola on, resulting in a standoff between her and Emma. Are there, like, no other men?

Noir and Emma head back out into the field to defeat a giant evil rabbit to earn the remaining 50,000 rel he needs for tuition. Since this battle takes up the most time and seems the most hazardous, you’d think the rabbit quest would be worth 250,000 and the grasshopper quest 50,000. I guess it’s best just not to think…at all.

When Emma’s attacks prove ineffective, Noir decides to the skills Olivia gave him to increase her attributes, but Noir doesn’t feel like coughing up 700 LP, so he buffs her weapon adeptness instead to the tune of 500 LP. He gets more than enough LP to cover the magic with a slobbery ear-nibbling session with Emma. Her moans end up luring the rabbit to them, and she defeats it as easily as everything has fallen into Noir’s lap so far.

He gets the 300,000 rel he needs, he gets another hug from Lola and Emma (who make up after a rough start) and thanks to a skill he created that lets him store the dead rabbit in a trans-dimensional space, he ingratiates himself with the entire guild by offering it for a feast. When pressed for a speech, he thinks of how none of this would be possible without Olivia…only to not so much as mention her to the guild of which she was a member.

Looks like the easy times and make-out sessions are only going to continue from here. As I said last week, those looking for serious conflict, adversity, or any kind of surprises are barking up the wrong tree. This week I can add “receptionists unwilling to arbitrarily debase themselves” and “thrilling battle animation” to the growing list of stuff not in this anime.

The Hidden Dungeon Only I Can Enter – 01 (First Impressions) – Born on Third

As a “mere” baronet, Noir Starga may be at the bottom of the noble caste pyramid of his nation. His family isn’t fuck-you rich, all the higher classes look down on them, and he has to get an actual job to support himself. But while his librarian job is stolen by a higher-ranking baron the day he’s supposed to start, life seems awfully sweet for Noir!

For one thing, he has two living parents, despite being a character in a fantasy anime! He also has a cute brocon imouto in Alice and a smokin’ hot childhood friend in Emma Brightness (excellent name), whom I’m just going to pretend is the non-masochistic sister of KonoSuba’s Darkness. Noir and Emma were going to be co-workers, but she still has a solution for the migraines he suffers: swappin’ spit!

So far we’ve got a kid with a loving fam, a future wife, and oh yeah, that Great Sage skill tells him everything about the world, including the unexplained. Again, pretty sweet life. When making out with Emma cures his headaches, Noir’s free to use it to locate a hidden dungeon just 10 klicks from town. There, he hears Horie Yui’s voice and follows it to the buxom adventurer Olivia Servant.

Olivia has been chained up for two centuries, and is just happy to talk to another person. Rather than let her considerable skills go to waste, she copies and bestows them upon Noir. They are Get Creative (conjure any skill), Bestow (give any skill to anyone) and Editor (modify any skill). The only catch: the skills use a ton of Life Points (LP), gained by, well, living: essentially enjoying money, food, and sex.

Noir tries out his new OP skills in the dungeon, but the LP expenditure tires him out. He learns lying in Alice’s lap restores a bit of LP, while embracing a more daringly-dressed Emma the next day restores a lot. When she complains of shoulder pain from her rather prodigious bust, he uses Editor to temporarily shrink it; she has him undo the change immediately.

Armed with so many useful skills and numerous ready sources of LP, Noir changes course and decides to take the Hero Academy entrance exam. The exam begins with the admitees splitting off into parties of three, and members of the higher castes mock Noir for even speaking to them, but thankfully Emma joins him, as she only got a job at the library to be with him. The haughty vicountess Lenore completes the triad.

They split up looking for valuable monster loot, and Noir heads to the hidden dungeon where he encounters a Level 99 Grim Reaper. Despite only being Level 23, Noir has enough LP to Create the Heavy skill and Bestow it on the Reaper to slow it down, then creates a giant stone bullet and shoots it at the Reaper, defeating it.

The Reaper skull ends up giving Team Lenore the edge, and then some: they scored 128,000 points when the next two teams only managed 11,550 and 5,890. Noir was misled by the fact Olivia is a master of the OP skills she gave him, to the point even a Level 99 Boss is a mere scrub.

If you’re looking for complex characters, conflicts, or drama, you will find none in The Hidden Dungeon Only I Can Enter. If you’re looking for a competently-rendered non-isekai renaissance-y setting packed with cute characters, JRPG rules, understated ecchi, and basically a lot of the hero getting his way without much effort at all (as befits his noble station), you’ve come to the right place!

Our Last Crusade or the Rise of a New World – 05 – Hindrances to Her Chosen Fate Arise

Much to the surprise of the mages on guard, Alice and Rin show up at the new vortex site unannounced, and are soon joined by TuxedoLord Mask and his younger Zoa relation, Kissing, whom he considers to be on a power level close if not equal to Alice’s. He assures the princess they’ll be enough to protect the vortex from the Empire’s forces. Alice is troubled that the Zoa family seeks all-out war—and if she hadn’t come, they’d have exploited the vortex to towards that goal.

Meanwhile, Mismis locates the vortex—which wasn’t hard, as its a giant pillar of light on the horizon!—but they’re not the first on the scene. Their unit is confronted by Shanorotte’s, but when Mismis runs over to hug her, Noro-chan reveals her true colors: she and her unit are and always were loyal mages of the Sovereignty. She shocks Mismis with magic and prepares to take her away as a POW.

That’s when Nameless, who was nearby all along, de-cloaks and wounds Noro’s fellow mages. Nameless prepares to send a sword at Noro which will go through Mismis, but Iska deflects the blade. Nameless threatens to bring Iska up on charges for insubordination, but he doesn’t have time for him. He must return to the Imperial Base so he can bomb the vortex, which is a lost cause now that it’s firmly in enemy hands.

Back at the vortex, Noro presents her captive Mismis to Mask and Alice, who fears Mismis will recognize her from the Neutral City. Thankfully, Rin knocks Mismis out before she can say anything that could incriminate Alice. Mask and the Zoas are hawks, after all; the crown princess meeting with the enemy could be all the excuse they need to move against the Lous.

As it is, Alice simply asks Noro where the enemy base is, as she’s eager to meet back up with Iska as the fortune teller foretold. Only Iska has Nene and Jhin hang back while he infiltrates the enemy base, headed to the place Alice was just as she’s leaving.

Iska is able to easily wrest Mismis back from Noro’s sadistic clutches, but Noro is bailed out by Kissing, who attacks with summoned thorns that take on a variety of forms. Iska, who recognizes Kissing as a strong purebred, is able to hold out until Noro uses the thorns to destroy, then reconstruct an incoming Imperial missile.

That explosion is seen by Alice after she returns to the Imperial base. Nameless is waiting for her there, and manages to cut both Rin and Alice, but then Alice goes all out with Ice Calamity, forcing Nameless to flee. The blast in the distance convinces Alice she should never have left the vortex zone; she must’ve just missed Iska.

Iska is able to slip past Kissing’s thorny offense-defense and knock her unconscious with a non-lethal blow, but then Mask shows up to carry her away, shoving Mismis into the vortex to buy time for their escape. Iska jumps in after her and eventually grabs hold of Mismis. Alice returns just in time to watch him leap in, and she leaps in after him.

The ensuing scene is highly amusing for its informality considering the situation. Despite descending through a column of surging astral energy that apparently has no bottom, Alice blushes at the sight of Iska and treats him as if he stood her up at the base. Still, she agrees to help him and Mismis out of there if he agrees to fight her as soon as they’re back on the ground.

Iska agrees, and the two join hands just as the astral energy surges further. Suddenly they hear a fell voice in the din—an astral spirit’s chant—and the column detonates and dissipates, separating Alice and Iska and dispelling them to different remote areas of the surface. Rin meets back up with Alice, who is annoyed her next battle with Iska has again been postponed by outside forces. Nene and Jhin pull up to find Iska and Mismis, none the worse for wear all things considered.

With the vortex gone, there may be nothing left for either side to do, but more vortices are sure to crop up. We’re left wondering if it was Alice and Iska’s holding hands that caused the vortex to close, which could portend an interesting possible destiny for the pair. If astral vortices are akin to nuclear weapons, or at least sources of atomic-esque energy that can bring about great death and destruction, it falls upon these two to ensure those sources never fall into the hands of either side’s warmongering factions.

I may be off-base with that theory, but it fits with both Alice and Iska’s reluctance to escalate the conflict and desire to bring about a lasting peace. This week’s events underscored the difficulty of that goal, with players like Noro, Kissing, Mask, and Nameless all unwittingly conspiring to hinder Alice and Iska’s continued interaction. The more they fight, the more they’ll understand and trust one another, and the better positioned they’ll be to save the world.

TONIKAWA: Over the Moon For You – 05 – Any Old Ring Will Do

Tsukasa and Nasa’s marital bliss is suddenly, sharply interrupted by Tsukasa’s realization that Nasa doesn’t own a television. On one level, that’s quite admirable for a studious young man; on the other, if he’s going to be married to Tsukasa, there’s going to have to be a TV in the house, because she’s a TV and movie buff, with particular enthusiasm for the oeuvre of one James Cameron. But like her futon, she doesn’t need the best; a god cheap TV will do just fine.

While waiting for Tsukasa at the baths, Nasa tells Kaname that he proposed, though they don’t have rings yet. Kaname stops Nasa before he spews one of the three main husband clichés she so wonderfully proceeds to recite: that their wife doesn’t care about fancy trips, going out for fancy food, or fancy jewelry. Yet when Tsukasa emerges fresh from the bath, both she and Nasa exchange looks that suggest rings really aren’t necessary.

Nasa has to go in to work, which means leaving Tsukasa alone for the day. He feels bad about this, and can sense that she’s feeling a little lonely when they stop to sit on a lakeside bench in the park. That’s when the two both lean in for a long, sweet kiss—just as Chitose’s maids are ready to pounce on them anew. Where this scene kicks so much ass is that the kiss isn’t interrupted at the last second, and the maids don’t interfere. In fact, they aren’t seen again!

Instead, the balance of the episode centers on Nasa’s insistence he procure not one or two but three rings—an engagement ring for Tsukasa and wedding bands for the two of them—to serve as reminders of one another and symbols of their enduring love. The ever-practical Tsukasa only sees it as a waste of money…but just how much money remains unknown to Nasa.

She takes him to the fanciest jewelry store in a fancy district to try to dissuade him from his crusade, but Nasa harbors the foolish belief the brilliance and cost of the diamond must be proportional to the amount of love he feels for Tsukasa. The attendant’s sales pitch is so strong he almost liquidates all his assets. Worse still, when Tsukasa takes him to a budget jewelry store, he starts to think ¥680,000 is “cheap”—which I guess it is, after seeing ¥9,000,000 rings!

When Tsukasa discovers that Tsukasa is doing this far for her, so she won’t be lonely, she kisses him and tells him, essentially, that if they absolutely must have diamond wedding rings, the cheapest ones will do. They settle on a pair costing a total of ¥32,000—which is still a lot of money for “little rocks!”

But Nasa need not despair that the rings aren’t worthy of symbolizing their love. Tsukasa tells him every time she’ll look at her new ring she’ll remember the day he bought it for her, how kind he is, and how much he takes care of her, and those thoughts will make give the ring a surpassing shine that won’t fade. Nasa never had to buy the moon for Tsukasa. It’s the thought—and his love—that counts!