On the one hand, I watched a good deal of this episode with a firm frown on my face, bitterly annoyed and disappointed that Sinon is, for lack of a better word, comprehensively emasculated from the in-game bad-ass we liked so much since her first episode, and put into the position where the steady, reliable Kirito has to rescue her, even if she’s not even sure she wants to be rescued.
On the other hand, that Sinon we liked never really existed. She was only a front; a shell Asada Shino created when she started GGO as a form of therapy. In other words, when it was just a game. When suddenly confronted with a trigger for her PTSD—namely, the gun she used to kill someone—she crumbles and can no longer pull the trigger, but there’s nothing out of left field about that; it makes sense, when taking all her circumstances into account.
The flaw in Sinon’s goal, as laudable as it sounded in theory, was that even if she was recognized as the strongest player in GGO, it wouldn’t have any effect on the Asada Shino in the real world. Sinon was a persona, and a fragile one, that the reality of her psychological issues was simply too much for. So while we’re disappointed Shino had to hit rock bottom, it’s better for her illusion of strength to be broken now, not quite halfway through, so she can begin the process of becoming stronger the right way (whatever that is).
You may ask yourself: “But Hannah, if Sinon gets so worked up around Death Gun and her past, why is Kirito such a cool cucumber?” Well, I have a few answers to that. Sinon had to kill when she was just eleven years old; she killed in the real world, getting literal blood on her hands; she was ostracized by her peers. Shino got the shorter end of the stick all around, and had a far weaker support system. Long before Kirito was trapped in SAO, Shino was trapped in a prison of guilt and self-loathing.
She’s still not completely out of that prison, and Kirito is still in one of his own. As cool and composed as he was this week, he still can’t guarantee he won’t abandon her, turn tail and run when that Death Gun is pointed at him again. Storms of fear and doubt rage beneath his calm exterior, Sinon just hasn’t seen it’s full extent, while we (and Nurse Aki) have.
I’ll be honest: the show is currently breaking zero ground in having the girl rely on the guy so much thus far, but I can accept this setback provisionally if it represents the first step towards her properly dealing with her past (Wishful thinking? We’ll see!), which could lead to a stronger, more stable self. That’s a greater possibility now that she knows Kirito shares the burden of having killed for real. She’s been working so hard to forget about what she did, but Kirito did forget, and can speak from experience: forgetting and plowing ahead will never be as effective as acceptance and forgiveness.